


Saving Merlin

by WordsAreTrulyBeautiful



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon Era, Fluff, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Magic Reveal, Merlin cares a lot, Multiple Pov, Possessive!Arthur, Protective!Arthur, So does Arthur, The Poisoned Chalice- Au, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, all the feels really, mentions of events from previous episodes, morgana pre- being aware she has magic, specifically The Mark of Nimueh, spoilers in the tags, uther is a cruel dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-09-12 20:20:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9089263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WordsAreTrulyBeautiful/pseuds/WordsAreTrulyBeautiful
Summary: A prompt given to me via my ask box on Tumblr: Season one, The Poisoned Chalice. Arthur is in the room when he thinks Merlin has died and instead of Gwen kissing Merlin, Arthur does.
Challenge accepted.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic for BBC Merlin. 
> 
> I didn't actually mean for it to be this long, but I'm rubbish at making things short. I hope it's all right, and that the anon that sent me this prompt enjoys it, at least. I had fun writing it, and I just did a rough edit of it. As per usual, I don't own anything.
> 
> If you'd like to follow my BBC Merlin blog, you can click [here](http://arthur-the-cute.tumblr.com/)

* * *

 

A shaft of light coming in from the barred window and hitting his back was the only warmth Arthur felt standing in the damp cell. His loose thin red shirt was no help against the chill in the dungeons, but Arthur was too angry to be bothered about that right now.

His amour had been removed and taken away quickly before he was escorted to the cell to await his father. His father, who was standing just in the doorway, jaw tense and pupils constricted. Arthur stared at him in disbelief. He had to get to Merlin. Couldn’t this all wait?

Arthur understood the implications of what he had done. How it looked to the people and anyone who heard about it. He was sure that his father had tried to keep a lid on the fact that his own son had gone against direct orders. His direct orders. The King’s orders. The Prince had defied his very own father. Arthur understood how that looked. But it was necessary and everyone would understand why.

He’d not said a word for a short while, just stared at Arthur and paced slightly. Arthur hung his head, not in shame but in anger. They were wasting time. Uther looked directly at Arthur, stopping in his pace. “You disobeyed me,” Uther stated, more irritated than angry.

“Of course I did; a man's life was at stake.” Arthur answered without a beat, with more reprimand than was polite, even as a son to a father. He locked eyes with his father, trying to keep back the anger and desperate wish to just push past his father and _run_ to Merlin’s side. “Do not let Merlin die because of something I did,” Arthur finished, pleased that it came out more like a logical suggestion than a pathetic plea.

Mouth open in disbelief of his own, Uther looked at his son with confusion. “Why do you care so much?” he asked out of an honest curiosity, “the boy is just a servant.”

For a second Arthur was scared. Why did he care so much? That was a dangerous path to go down. There were reasons that Arthur knew he, as both Merlin’s Prince and friend, could never allow himself to think of. Merlin was not just a servant. He should be.

Well, no, he shouldn’t. What Merlin should be is Giaus’s apprentice, and nothing to do with Arthur. Merlin should be the beautiful boy with the porcelain skin, brilliant blue eyes, impossibly high cheekbones, and the flash of black hair that Arthur sees sporadically around Camelot and constantly in his fantasizes. That was what Arthur had planned from the second he first saw Merlin. 

Then the bloody idiot went and saved his life and was appointed his manservant.

Arthur was never supposed to see him this often, never supposed to become his friend, and certainly never supposed to fall in love with him.

Merlin was no just a servant. He might be that in Uther’s eyes, but not in Arthur’s. He _had_ to be that in Uther’s eyes. If his father ever found out or ever had an idea of what Merlin truly meant to Arthur, he’d put him to death without hesitation. Especially after the little stunt Arthur had just pulled for him.

_Why do you care so much?_

Arthur was scared by the question. Partially because of the answer, but mostly because of the look in his father’s eyes. That look that told Arthur that Uther was heading to a realization and his father knew it too. He just needed the slightest bit of push in the right direction and he’d arrive to it all on his own. Arthur would lose Merlin no matter what. That couldn’t happen.

So instead, Arthur pushed his feelings away as he was so used to doing, and stuck to the facts that might prove Merlin to be a deserving _servant_ , whom had saved Arthur twice now in front of his father.

“He knew the danger he was putting himself in,” Arthur started, “and he knew what would happen if he drank from that goblet-“ Uther turned away in annoyance, clearly putting it down to Author’s morals acting up again, “-but he did it anyway,” Arthur told him. “He saved my life,” he stated, close to daring his father to challenge him on this. When nothing happened, and Arthur found himself looking at the back of his father’s head. He continued. “There's more.” Uther turned, listening closer at the change in tone of Arthur’s voice. It was the tone Arthur used when he made his reports, not those that he used to justify his actions. “There was a woman at the mountain,” Arthur told him. His father waited for more, turning further towards him. “She knew I was there for the flower.” Uther’s expression was confused and curious once more, and he faced his son fully. Arthur looked his father in the eyes and said, “I don't think it was Bayard who tried to poison me.”

Uther looked unamused. “Of course it was,” he stated, brushing Arthur off.

Arthur locked eyes with his father, frustration pulling at him. His father’s face told him that his mind was made up. Knowing this, and his father’s infuriating stubbornness, Arthur knew there was no point in continuing the argument. He’d told him, and that was that.

What mattered now was Merlin.

Merlin who might be dead if Arthur is too late. The restriction in his chest made Arthur’s breathing come just slightly heavier. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the flower with care. His father watched him as he walked closer, determination in his eyes that he hoped masked the desperation and fear.

“Gaius knows what to do with it,” he told his father, holding it out to him. His father’s confused gaze left his own in favor of taking in the reason for Arthur’s mission. The delicate flower that Arthur was holding with great care.

Uther took it in hand, not able to feel the fragile thing through his gloved hand.

“Put me in the stocks for a week,” Arthur said, “a month even,” he added. “I don't care.” And he didn’t. He looked at his father, fear a lead weight in his stomach. “Just make sure it gets to him,” he told him. Uther looked at him, unimpressed with the flower and clearly thinking it all through. Arthur searched his eyes, letting his father see how much this means to him. “I'm begging you,” he stated before taking a couple feet back, allowing his father to take in what he’d said.

Uther’s gaze had changed from the bewilderment they had held when their conversation had started, and now looked cold and suspicious. He looked at Arthur with a harsh dullness that Arthur didn’t understand until he the movement his father was doing became more apparent. The shinning leather gloved had that had been, Arthur now realized, squeezing, was now crushing. It was bunching the delicate flower up, rubbing it together, and crushing it in without hesitation.

The flower, the only thing that would save Merlin.

“NO!” Arthur yelled, rushing forward, hands outreached as if to grab his father’s hand, but falling short as he knew it would just make things far worse. Arthur’s eyes never left the gloved hand, panic making his heart race and his mind blaring with alarms. His eyes snapped to his father as the realization hit him that he had done this intentionally. Without remorse, he had condemned a man to death. A man that he knows has saved Arthur’s, his _son’s_ , the _prince’s_ , life _twice_ now.

In a quiet and firm tone, with his cruel eyes on Arthur’s face, Uther told him, “You have to learn there's a right and a wrong way of doing things.”

Arthur couldn’t respond, his emotions were turbulent and none of them could decide to take control enough to force an action from his shocked body.  

“I'll see you're let out in a week,” his father said, turning to leave.

Arthur’s chest heaved as he struggled not to do something rash, something stupid, something that would come dangerously close to treason. He watched his father leave as he stared at him in disgusted horror. His heart hurt, his stomach clenched, and he felt like he’d be sick.

With a dead-eyed expression, Uther turned to his son. “Then you can find yourself another servant,” he ordered him, tone close to mocking. He dropped the flower pointedly on the ground as Arthur stood, forcing himself to stay frozen lest he rush at his father in anger. Merlin told him he had anger issues, but Merlin had not seen Arthur when he felt this enraged.

There was the hurt as well, Arthur realized as his father disappeared around a corner. The sense of betrayal that kept Arthur’s rage from the burning inferno it could be as he looked between the spot his father had occupied and the crushed flower on the ground. It was like a stabbing sensation in his heart, small but sharp. It was only the sound of the cell door closing that pulled Arthur from his haze of pain.

He rushed to the door, dropping to his stomach as he reached out his arm as far as it could go. Further than was comfortable, as he tried to push his reach. The flower lay just beyond the tips of his fingers. His body felt the anticipation of the touch, but he couldn’t complete it. He twisted his arm, trying to force part of his shoulder through the iron bars. The flower lay sadly on the dirt ground. Arthur’s fingers shook with the strain as he tried to will them or his arm or both to grow longer.

***~*~*~***

Gwen walked into Gaius’s chambers feeling disheartened. Her feet dragged as she made her way to where the old physician was kneeling by Merlin’s side. As the door shut with a loud creak, Gaius looked up from a sweat drenched Merlin.

“He hasn't got much longer,” he said, and Gwen felt her spirits sink even lower.

She could hear Merlin’s ragged breaths, his chest rattling as he struggled for his last breathes. He was as pale as a sheet, and the sweat had long since soaked the sheets, pillows, and blankets.

“Has Arthur got the flower?” Gaius asked.

Gwen walked to the head of Merlin’s cot, hands out in defeat as she replied honestly, “I don't know.” She wished she had news. “Uther won't allow anyone to see him,” she explained.

News that the prince had returned spread quickly through the castle. When the news reached them, Gwen had gasped in relief, and Gaius had smiled as he wiped Merlin’s fire hot brow. It was only as hour went by and there was no Arthur rushing through the door did they Gwen think that something might have happened.

Word spread equally quickly that the king was more than a little displeased with Arthur’s actions, and had in fact, locked him up. The other servants were cowering in fear at the thought to what he might do to one of them if they disobeyed him, if he was willing to imprison his own son, the prince.

Merlin twisted in the sheets, head lolled to the side as his body was too weak to do anything else. His breathing was worsening by the minute. Pained whimpers came from Merlin as he fought to hold on to his life. Gwen watched on hopelessly, hating it.

“Is there nothing we can do to help?” she asked desperately.

Gaius shifted his weight, knees creaking in protest. Merlin’s chest gave a horrid drowning sound as he gasped for another breath, pulling Gaius’s attention to him once more. “Only the leaf of the Mortaeus flower can save him,” Gaius said in despondency.

“Then we have to find out if Arthur has it,” Gwen stated as she started to pace. It was the only solution. She had been thinking of a solution to that problem on her way back to these very chambers. The only one she saw was risky, and she wasn’t sure how it would go if she were honest. If she were to be caught, she’d be hanged. It was, however, the only solution, and she’d already made up her mind. She would do it. She - Merlin’s next breath stuttered in his chest, and Gwen stopped the pacing and even thinking. She turned to voice her solution to Gaius. “I could sneak into the dungeon,” she said, the words feeling final now that they were officially voiced.

“That would be very dangerous,” Gaius pointed out, voicing what Gwen already knows. He looked her with a slightly odd look, as if seeing a new side of her.

“I've got to,” she said, “Merlin will die if I don't.”

As if to prove a point, Merlin’s struggled to get a breath in. His head tilted up, his back arching in panic as he tried in vain to get air. His brow was furrowed, but his eyes were calmly closed, no energy left to squeeze shut. His throat worked to swallow the air he did manage to pull in through his mouth.

Gaius glanced at him, seeing all the signs. It was obvious to anyone who saw Merlin now; he would be dead within hours if he did not get that cure.

“Be careful,” he told Gwen, hoping to express his thankfulness in the phrase. Gwen nodded in understanding, sparing a glance to Merlin before running from the room.

Gwen’s first stop was the kitchens. It was near suppertime, and the knights would not think twice of her coming to feed the prince.

She walked into a chaotic scene of women rushing around and preparing plates. There was a large assortment of baked goods on one counter, but they were far too organized for her to take even one without raising an alarm. The meats were the same, and being guarded by the cooks, who were trying to arrange the platter as visually appealingly as possible.

Gwen frowned, moving her head side to side as she stood on her tiptoes to survey the kitchens. Her eyes focused in on a table by the ovens. Towards the back of it, by the brick wall, was a burnt loaf of bread. With a triumphant smile, Gwen made a beeline for it.

She subtly took a plate from the freshly cleaned pile stacked up to her shoulder. She kept it low, and walked with confidence. Nobody even glanced at her.

As she got closer to the bread, she spotted a woman cutting pieces off a large block of cheese. It was no doubt going to someone already, but as there was a large block, Gwen was sure a piece or two would not be missed. As the girl turned away to fetch something or other, Gwen quickly snagged two pieces, slipping them onto the plate and carrying on towards the bread.

A smile broke out on Gwen’s face as she left the kitchens with a plate of bread and cheese. She hopped that Arthur’s meal would not be different than that of a typical prisoner, as she wasn’t sure she’d be able to run fast enough if the guards were to catch her before she entered the dungeons at all.

Gwen blinked in realization.

She wouldn’t be fast enough. At all. She’d never make it out if they caught her. If she didn’t make it, Merlin would die. Arthur could make it though. He needed to be let out, but he could make it. She frowned as she walked, unsure how she’d be able to make that work.

Gwen thought about this as she walked down the wrought iron stairway, plate in hand, and approached a guard. The knight was standing with a spear in hand, his helmet and chainmail shining in the candlelight.

“Food for the prisoner,” she said, keeping her voice light. Without a word, the guard motioned for her to go through the door at the end of the hall. Gwen nodded, and as her eyes were downcast, she caught a glimpse of the key on the guard’s belt. Thinking fast, Gwen moved forward and purposely stepped on her dress. She tumbled forward, and as predicted, the guard caught her as she gripped the plate harder to stop it from falling. Her body thudding into his.

She used the impact as a distraction when she tugged the key from his belt. “I’m so sorry,” she said, putting a hand on the guard to steady herself. The man smiled at her as the other guards watched in amusement. “I’m not normally this clumsy,” she said, her cheeks reddening from her heart race pumping. The knight looked at her with sympathy, taking it for embarrassment.

“Happens all the time,” he said quietly as he leaned in.

Gwen smiled slightly, moving away as she hid the key in her pocket. She gave a small curtsey and polite clearing of her throat before she made her way inside.

She walked slowly into the dungeons, the damp cold seeping into her shoes. There were no guards in the hall once she had entered. She tried to plot escape routes if need be, but was unsure were the halls would lead. She never spent time down here.

The only person who would know these halls well enough would be Arthur. Another reason why he stood a better chance at getting back to Merlin than she did.

Speaking of Arthur, as she turned the corner, Gwen saw him. He was in the far cell, sitting hunched over in defeat. His leg was bent; his hand drooped over it as his head was hung. There was one guard outside his cell, standing without a spear or helmet, which told Gwen nobody was even considering Arthur would attempt to escape.

The guard saw her coming, and eyed the plate of food. She smiled with a strain at him and nodded to Arthur. The door to the cell was unlocked, the sound pulling Arthur’s attention from the ground and to them.

A spark of hope flared to life in his eyes as he saw Gwen, and Gwen held his gaze. Really, the guards ought to know the regular servants that do this duty, or at least know that Gwen is Lady Morgana’s handmaid.

As she walked in, Gwen pushed those thoughts aside, turning to watch the guard. The knight stood in the doorway, blocking the thing completely. His expression was serious, but he didn’t look like he’d be too smart. His eyes remained forward, and he didn’t utter a word as he stood stoically in the door.

Gwen walked to Arthur, who was still in the same position. He kept his eyes forward, ignoring her. She was confused at first that he didn’t ask about Merlin, until she realized if he did that it would give away who she was and ruin it all. With her back to the guard, Gwen was free to smile at him with warmth. A wave of gratitude swept over her as Arthur kept his face neutral.

“Set it down over there,” he ordered in a monotone voice, gesturing softly with his head toward the side of the room.

Gwen frowned in confusion. She watched Arthur again, but he just sat back against the wall, looking bored and a bit irritated. She wondered if he was going to slide the flower to her, or perhaps hand it over when the guard wasn’t looking. She turned to see the guard still standing resolutely in the door. He wasn’t moving, and Arthur looked like he didn’t expect him too. Gwen looked between them again, not understanding anything. It was only until Arthur’s eyes darted to hers for a second that she went with it.

It was obvious that Arthur only meant to glance at her, and keep his expression void of emotions. However, when his blue eyes met her brown ones, a whirlwind of worry and fear met her crystal clear. He seemed unable to take his gaze away, the questions coming flooding out in their locked staring. How was Merlin? Was he alive? Was Arthur too late? Does he have any hope? Realizing this was getting dangerously close to revealing something to the knight standing watch, Gwen broke eye contact first.

“Thank you,” Arthur told her, and they both knew he wasn’t thanking her for the supper.

She nodded, and set the plate on the small table. To her dismay, there was nothing there. She frowned, wondering if Arthur had failed in his mission. Perhaps there was no flower. Which meant there was no hope for Merlin. Swallowing the sudden lump in her throat, Gwen stepped back and turned to leave.

She wasn’t sure if she’d go back to Gaius’s chambers. She didn’t think she’d be able to bare watching Merlin die. Gwen didn’t register that Arthur had gotten up, or that he had gone to the table as she thought of this. It wasn’t until Arthur’s voice calls out.

“Wait a minute,” he said, voice sounding more like Arthur, and hope surged in Gwen.

She turned as the guard moved away from the cell door. Arthur was standing by the table, back to her. She watched as he put the plate back down, and walked back to the spot where he had been sitting on the floor.

“I couldn't possibly eat this; it's disgusting,” Arthur stated on his way.

Gwen glanced at the guard, unsure what to do. The knight didn’t move. She wondered, again, how she would break Arthur out.

“The state it's in,” Arthur said, drawing her attention back to him, “I'm not sure it's fit for _anyone_ ,” he told her, emphasizing each word. His face was neutral, but his tone was screaming something. Gwen just didn’t know what.

She turned to pick up the plate as Arthur sat back down. As she glanced to him, she saw he was practically forcing himself into a neutral expression. It seemed he was almost smiling, which definitely meant something. She looked down at the plate in her hand, and smiled when she saw the flower on hidden between the pieces of bread.

The flower. The flower that would save Merlin. Arthur had succeeded, and Merlin would live. Gwen frowned. He would only live if he was Gaius was given the flower in time. Gwen needed to break Arthur out of the cell _now_.

Unfortunately, she had to leave the cell, and she could feel her opportunity shriveling into nothing. She was unsure how she would tell Arthur that he had to break out, she was unsure how she’d even get him out, and she was unsure how she’d pass the flower back to Arthur for him to run.

As took a few steps out of the cell, she remembered the key in her pocket and her eyes narrowed in thought. She slipped her hand into her pocket, and pulled the key out discreetly. She walked another couple of steps and coughed, dropping the key to the ground.

“Oh,” she said, making a point of tilting her head at the ground. “I think I’ve found something,” she told the guard.

A frown on his face, the guard walked over after locking the cell door. Arthur’s head had popped up, and he was eyeing Gwen with suspicion, shoulders tense and jaw locked.

“I don’t suppose that’s supposed to be there,” Gwen said.

The guard frowned deeper, looking at the key on the ground. He dropped to a squat, picking it up and turning it around. “No, I don’t suppose it is,” he said gruffly. “Must ‘ave fallen off someone,” he summed up. “I’ll turn it in at the end of the night, no worries miss,” he told her. “Thanks for the warning,” he mumbled, turning it over in his hand.

“I’m so sorry,” Gwen said then, and smashed the plate down on his head, holding on to the flower. The bread and cheese went flying, hitting the ground and rolling into away. The guard crashed to the floor, unconscious.

“GUINEVERE!” Arthur yelped with shock as he jumped up to his feet.

Gwen ignored him in favor of snatching the key from the guard’s belt. She rushed to Arthur’s cell, hoping that nobody heard the noise or came to check on the guard. Arthur was by the cell door, utterly shocked as he watched her unlock the door and swing it open.

“You have to hurry, Arthur,” she said, ignoring the look on his face, or the way his eyes kept going from her to the guard. “Take the flower and go to Gaius’s chambers. You know your way around, so you’ll be able to make it without being seen. And, if you get caught, you’re faster than me,” Gwen explained. Arthur was frozen, mouth agape. “Please, it was the only way,” she tried again. Arthur didn’t move. Gwen glanced around, knowing she’d stayed too long. If they waited any longer, the other guards would be in to check. “We’ve not got much time,” she tried again. Her thoughts drifted to Merlin, struggling to breathe and stay alive. “Merlin’s not got much time,” she corrected herself.

Arthur blinked, looking at her, eyes clearing of shock. Gwen held out the flower. His eyes darted to it and back to her before he nodded.

“What’ll you do?” he asked.

“I’ve given the prisoner food,” Gwen stated, sighing in acceptance. “All I have to do is walk out.”

“The guard? The plate?” Arthur prompted. “What’ll you do about them?”

“Leave it to me,” Gwen said firmly, filling herself up with false confidence. She glanced at the flower. “You get that to Gaius,” she said.

“Good luck, Guinevere,” Arthur said. Gwen smiled at him as she took a deep breath.

“You, too.”

With that, Arthur grabbed the flower and started running. Gwen looked at the body and sighed. She suddenly felt a surge of determination. Whether Merlin was to live or die today, she would be by his side through it all. Which meant she had to get there.

Gwen dragged the knight towards the wall, propping him up against it as if in sleep. He was heavy and she found herself a bit out of breath once she’d finished. She gathered the plate, miraculously not broken in half, and found the pieces of bread and one of the pieces of cheese.

She dusted them off and placed them on the plate. Brushing her hair down and smoothing her dress, she prepared herself for a performance of a lifetime. She walked, head held high, to the door.

She half expected there to be alarm bells going off the moment she stepped out, but nothing happened at all. The guard that she’d taken the key from looked at her and smiled. She returned it with a small nod.

“You,” a knight’s voice yelled out. Gwen froze, fear shooting up her spine and making her skin prickle. "Wait!”

Gwen stopped, tense and scared. She forced herself not to tremble through sheer force of will as she turned around to face the approaching guard. He walked over, not saying anything else. Gwen had to tilt her head back to look him in the eye. He looked down at the plate, and poked around at the food. He grabbed a piece of bread, not noticing the bit of dirt stuck to it.

“Waste not, want not, eh?” he said, and Gwen realized he sounded like a nice person, but was too terrified at the moment to think on it for too long. He could still locker her up, or run her through if he found out what she’d done. “We're not all as precious as our Royal Highness,” the man said, and Gwen forced her lips to smile.

The was the sound of footsteps coming down the staircase to their right, and Gwen knew she had to get out of there immediately if she was going to get out at all. As the guard took a bite of the bread, seemingly done with her, she turned to leave, just as another serving girl walked down the last steps, a plate and cup in hand.

Gwen was already on half way up the steps when she reached the guard.

“Food for Prince Arthur,” the girl stated.

Gwen froze for a split second before dropping the plate she was holding and making a run for it.

“Stay where you are!” the guards yelled in realization, but it was too late. Gwen was taking the steps two or three at a time, skirt in hand so she wouldn’t trip.

***~*~*~***

Arthur burst into the room, startling Gaius from where he was pacing by the cot. Gaius looked grave, and it made Arthur panic. Neither of them bothered with a greeting, although there was a look of confusion at seeing Arthur in Gaius’s eyes.

As Arthur rushed towards him, he called out, “How is he?”

“Have you got the Mortaeus?” Gaius asked, and that in itself would have been answer enough, but Arthur saw Merlin was laying in the cot, on the brink of death.

Merlin looked skin and bone, even more so than before. Arthur could see his collarbones were protruding out, as if the skin would tear away. His skin was ghostly white in some areas, but grey in others. Every inch of him was covered with a layer of sweat. His clothes were soaked through, and the blankets had been pushed aside. His dark hair was plastered to his head, the stands clumped together with sweat on his head. His chest was barely moving. There was no sounds, which Arthur was more worried about. He’d expected writhing, whimpering, rattling breathing, anything. No sound was far more horrible to hear.

“Here,” he said, handing the flower over numbly to Gaius.

“His breathing's much worse. We have to hurry.” Gaius said, taking the flower and turning it over. He was no doubt confused by the crushed thing, but Arthur couldn’t find the ability to speak to explain. He just hoped it would still work.

Arthur sat down next to Merlin's sickbed, face in hand, as he watched over his manservant. He could hear Gaius begin to crush the flower leaf, as the door to his chambers opened once more. Gwen ran in, looking frantic, she rushed over to the other side of Merlin.

Her eyes racked down Merlin’s form and tears pricked her vision. She busied herself by getting the rag and wiping his forehead. Arthur frowned and wondered why he hadn’t thought of that. Gwen started to speak to Merlin softly as Arthur just watched.

“It’s all right,” she murmured. The sweat was coming faster than she could wipe it away. Merlin’s chest was moving less and less. “You’ll be fine,” she cooed to him.

Arthur felt a hollow start to form in his chest that seemed to echo and burn at the same time. He hated seeing Merlin like this. He wanted, needed, him to wake up. He needed him to be his usual bubbly idiotic self, and he need him to open his eyes and look at Arthur and tell him he was okay.

Arthur needed to wake up himself, to Merlin’s peppy voice, while he was in bed, his head stuffed under a pillow. He needed to yell at Merlin to leave him alone, and feel that pull of the comfort of his bed to get some more sleep. He needed to hear Merlin walked over to his window and open it up, letting the birds’ song come in, and the sound of the life throughout the castle and Camelot to drift in too, making it impossible to fall back asleep. He needed Merlin to come rip the warm sheets off him and sigh as Arthur’s refusal to get up even then. He needed Merlin to insult him and be absolutely out of term to his prince, but not give a damn. He needed Merlin to be all right, and everything to go back to how it should be. He _needed_ it.

“Why have you stopped?” Gwen’s voice broke Arthur’s train of thought.

Arthur looked up to see Gaius standing with the partially crushed up flower, staring worriedly at nothing. It sent a wave of frigid panic over Arthur and he stood abruptly, the action causing Gaius to look between him, Gwen, Merlin, and the cure he was making.

“The poison was created using magic,” he reminded them. His eyes paused a fraction of a second longer than necessary on Arthur. “We may need magic to make an antidote,” he stated.

Arthur felt his heart drop. His throat constricted painfully as he looked to Merlin.

“But we can't,” Gwen said, voicing the obvious. “It's forbidden. Even if we could.”

Arthur felt their eyes on him, but he was at a loss. He was prince of Camelot. He was brought up to hate magic, had sworn to keep it out of Camelot and uphold it’s banned status. If magic was all that could keep Merlin alive, however, how could Arthur stand by and let him die? It was magic that did this to him, so wouldn’t it be fair to have magic undo this to him?

That was still breaking the law his father had set. Arthur couldn’t break the law. He couldn’t break this law for Merlin, while holding everyone else accountable to it. It was unjust, immoral, and there was no honor in it. To go against everything he is supposed to stand for? Not to mention if word got back to his father.

Arthur would have defied him, broken out of his cell, and broken the one law his father holds above all else. He would betray his father in the worst way. A part of Arthur told him that Uther deserved it. That Arthur should betray him as Uther had betrayed Arthur. But Arthur couldn’t do that. He would not do that.

Uther would kill Merlin if he found out. Whatever he would do to Arthur, it would include killing Merlin. Arthur wouldn’t be surprised if he did it himself, or forced Arthur to do it. That thought made him feel sick to his stomach, and Arthur actually hunched over a little as his hand went to hold his stomach at the sickening thought.

“I'll try and make it work without it,” Gaius said then, taking the decision away from Arthur.

Arthur swallowed, and nodded. Gwen looked skeptical, and she wipes Merlin’s brow gently. Arthur resisted the urge to take hold of Merlin’s hand.

“Oh, I need some fresh water,” Gaius stated, and held out two cups.

Arthur and Gwen both jumped up and took one each. Gwen raced out of the room ahead of him, but Arthur hesitated, looking at Merlin’s almost still body.

He didn’t know if he’d be able to bare it if Merlin died without him by his side. What if Gaius was preparing the cure when he passed, and no one was there to hold his hand? Merlin shouldn’t go like that. Arthur thought about calling Gwen back and handing her his cup.

“Sire, I need that water,” Gaius said, firmer this time.

Arthur swallowed, and with one last pleading look to Merlin, he rushed from the room. He was aware that if a guard saw him it would sound an alarm, but Arthur wouldn’t let them take him from Merlin’s side now.

If that meant he had to cut his own men down, he would stay by Merlin’s side.

But Arthur didn’t run into any guards. He found Gwen and they got their water quickly. A silent moment of fear passed between them when they locked gazes, a mutual love for Merlin being acknowledged. Arthur found himself, ridiculously so, prickling at the love he saw in Gwen’s eyes for Merlin. He wanted to know what it meant. Was that friendship he saw? Or was it a love like he had for Merlin?

He didn’t ask. Instead, they ran back to Gaius’s chambers as fast as they could without spilling their water. When they ran in, Gaius was standing by the desk where he had been making the potion. He turned when he saw them, and Arthur shoved the water into his hand on his way to Merlin’s side.

“Thank you,” Gaius said to them both.

Merlin appeared, if one didn’t look close enough, to not be breathing at all. It was only the slight movement of his shirt collar that told Arthur that he wasn’t just seeing the rising chest out of manic need. Some cruel hallucination that Merlin was alive when he wasn’t. No, for now, Merlin was still breathing. Barely, but he was doing it.

Arthur heard Gaius slosh the water into the potion as Gwen sat beside Merlin. He could hear the potion sizzling and foams for a moment as it mixed into the cool water.

“Hold his nose,” Gaius ordered to neither in particular as he rushed to Merlin, potion in hand.

Arthur pinched Merlin's nose, noting with almost relief as Merlin weakly tried to fight against the action. His back arched up as his mouth opened in attempt to breath. Gaius took the advantage and poured the potion into Merlin's mouth. To Arthur’s relief once more, he realized that Merlin’s lips tried to wrap around the potion bottle’s opening.

“Swallow, Merlin,” Gaius coaxed as the potion emptied into Merlin’s mouth. Arthur watched the liquid slowly disappear, Merlin’s throat working with effort. It looked to be all the effort Merlin had left to possess. “Swallow it,” Gaius said once more, as the sounds of Merlin drinking filled the chambers.

When Gaius leaned back, they all watched Merlin intently, not that Arthur noticed. His eyes were focused on Merlin. He took in every detail. The twitching that followed when he stopped swallowing. The slight arch of his back as he seemed to rock back and forth in tiny movements while the potion took affect. The way he settled after a couple of seconds, his head dropping back to a neutral positon on the pillow. His shoulders losing the tension that Arthur hadn’t noticed was even there. The way the sweat had stopped coming, and the skin dipped grey all over. The way his eyelids darkened and his brow un-furrowed. The part of his lips, and the relaxation that came over his face, the look of utter calm.

And finally, the way Merlin’s chest caved as he exhaled, his shoulders almost hunching over slightly and his chin dropping down, and how his lungs didn’t fill up again.

Merlin was still. Unnaturally still.

“He's stopped breathing,” Gwen said, putting voice to what they were all seeing and what Arthur had hopped was his tired and worried eyes playing a cruel trick. “What's happening?” Gwen asked, looking to Arthur as her voice trembled. “Gaius?” she prompted, eyes moving to the old man when Arthur wouldn’t meet her gaze. Gaius looked unsure and deeply worried.

In a fluid movement, he put his head to Merlin's chest. It was only for a moment, but Arthur felt like everything around him was falling apart and every moment lasted an eternity. He still hadn’t taken his eyes off Merlin. He wouldn’t and he couldn’t.

Merlin, who was so **still**.

He looked so relaxed, like someone who had a long and tiring day and was finally able to fall asleep. Merlin, who while shining in sweat and looking grey, was still the most beautiful thing Arthur had ever seen.

“His heart has stopped,” Gaius said.

Arthur had not registered the old man sitting up quickly, or the look of sorrow on his face. He did not hear Gwen’s sharp intake of breath, or feel the breeze of her hand rushing up to her mouth.

“He's dead,” Gwen said in disbelief, grief coloring her words.

The words seemed to break through Arthur’s numbness, and he heard an anguished sob. He didn’t realize it came from him. He didn’t realize that he’d fallen forward, onto his knees, that he’d stared at Merlin with tears streaming down his cheeks.

“No,” he heard himself say, it was broken and quivering, the sound pushed over a painful, choking lump in his throat. His face burned from the heat of his tears, his arm came up to his face, wiping away the wet mess. “Merlin isn’t-“

And he couldn’t even say it. He couldn’t. He _wouldn’t_.

Merlin wasn’t allowed to. He wasn’t allowed to leave Arthur. He wasn’t allowed. He was supposed to be there. Always be there. He wasn’t supposed to be lying weak, and looking like death, his entire body still. He wasn’t supposed to be like this. He had to wake up. He _had_ to.

Arthur needed him.

Arthur hadn’t told him. He’d never told him. It twisted the jagged knife in Arthur’s chest, the deep void of a hole that threatened to swallow Arthur whole was hurting so badly Arthur would have carved his chest out hollow if he could. It wasn’t supposed to feel like this.

_Why do you care so much?_

His father’s words echoed in his mind, pounding on his skull and bouncing lightly in a mocking dance across his mind all at the same time. They were seared into his skull, and they burned. They burned because Arthur knew the answer to that question. Arthur cared so much because he loved him.

He _loved_ him.

And he had never told him. He had never once told him. Now he never would get the chance. It made Arthur feel like he couldn’t breathe. It made him want to scream and smash everything. It made him want to destroy all of Camelot and the rest of the world. It made him want to hide. It made him want to curl up and _stop_. For everything in the whole world, in all of existence, to just _stop_.

It hurt worse than anything he had ever felt and it just grew and grew as the seconds ticked on. The dark, sucking, shattering void in his chest deepened and ached more and more. It made it impossible for him to feel yet all he could do was feel. Everything in him felt everything else. He felt more alive than he ever had, and he felt stone cold dead. It was the bursting extremes of every feeling that had Arthur wishing he’d been the one that drank that bloody poison.

He stared at Merlin, suddenly pushing himself onto his knees. Why had he drank it? Arthur had said he would, had gone for the cup, but Merlin had refused. He didn’t even look at Arthur when he drank. Arthur was not the last thing he saw. Arthur was whom Merlin saved, but it shouldn’t have been. Merlin should have let Arthur drink the poison. He disobeyed a direct order from his prince, from his friend. He had gone against Arthur and drank the poison when he knew, he _knew_ , that Arthur couldn’t lose him.

Except he didn’t know. Because Arthur never told him.

“Wake up,” Arthur gritted out, his hands twisted in Merlin’s shirt. “You can’t do this. You aren’t allowed to do this,” Arthur told him. Merlin didn’t respond. Merlin was cold. Arthur’s fingers grazed his skin as he held him, telling Merlin again that he wasn’t allowed to do this to him. The skin was grey. The skin was cold. Merlin was grey. Merlin was cold. Merlin was still. Merlin wasn’t breathing. Merlin’s heart had stopped.

Arthur dropped down on Merlin, worn out and broken. He sobbed into Merlin’s bony collar. His body now wet from sweat and Arthur’s tears, saliva, and snot. The fragile form felt so small under Arthur.

He pulled away quickly, not wanting to hurt Merlin in this delicate state, wiping his own face with his sleeve as he looked down. Merlin was blurry due to the tears in Arthur’s eyes. Arthur’s hand reached out to Merlin’s face, his peaceful face. He hesitated, unable to touch him. When his palm stroked down Merlin cold, wet cheek, Arthur broke again, and found himself holding Merlin carefully, as if he would break. “You’re not allowed to leave me,” Arthur struggled to whisper.

“He can't be,” Gaius said. “He can't be.”

Gwen was crying, her face buried in her hand as Gaius watched on without seeing. He blinked and looked at Arthur, curled over Merlin, holding him gently, lovingly.

“You were his destiny,” he said softly to Arthur, standing up as if to get away from the sight, to make it not true.

“It's my fault,” Gwen was saying. “If I'd have got to Arthur sooner, if I'd have been quicker,” she said trailing off as she cried. She stood and Gaius pulled her into him, holding her as she cried.

“No, no,” he said, patting her head. “It was me,” he spoke softly. “I should've looked after him better,” Gaius stated, guilt heavy in his voice. “It's my fault.”

“No,” Arthur said, pulling away from Merlin. They both looked at him. He swallowed thickly. “You two did everything right, you aren’t to blame,” he told them. “I let him drink the poison. It’s me who should be dead, not-“

Arthur had to cut himself off. Gwen’s puffy red eyes looked at him as Gaius regarded him with deep mourning. Arthur cleared his throat. It didn’t do anything.

“I shouldn’t have let him drink the poison,” he told them. “It’s my responsibility. As his Prince-” Arthur closed his eyes. “- as his friend, I shouldn’t have let him do it.” There was silence in the room. “He was one of the bravest men I knew, and he was a good friend, and a loyal servant. He was more than that.” Arthur’s heart felt like it was being torn to shreds over and over again with every word he uttered. “He was-“

“Does this mean I get a day off?” Merlin’s voice came, loud and clear.

Arthur spun around, eyes bugging out, unable to feel anything as every feeling stopped, but his mind and heart couldn’t process what was happening.

“Merlin!” Gaius said, a smile breaking out on his face. “You're alive.”

”No. I'm the ghost come back to haunt you,” Merlin joked and oh gods he was joking. He was well enough to joke. He was well. He wasn’t dead. _He_ _wasn’t_ _dead_. He was alive. He was-

Arthur grabbed Merlin's face and kissed him.

Merlin’s lips were chapped and cool against his own. Arthur had kissed him before Merlin had finished his sentence. Or it might have been right after. Or during. He wasn’t sure. He didn’t care. He just knew that Merlin’s mouth was open as a result and Arthur’s tongue slid right in. His hands cradling Merlin’s face, one carding through his sweaty hair.

Merlin was surprised at being kissed at all, and he couldn’t be blamed for it, Arthur knew. He hadn’t expected to be kissed breathless - and that was exactly what Arthur was going to do - after coming back to life, especially by Arthur.

It was the kiss that Arthur received back that made him wonder if he’d fall down on his knees all over again. Merlin’s lips were warming up underneath his, and Arthur knew body heat was a fast way to get him warm. He wanted to strip Merlin down and warm him up.

He stroked Merlin’s tongue with his own before remembering himself, where he was, who was around, and what he was doing.

Arthur let go of Merlin and pulled back, eyes wide. Merlin looked back at him, shocked and catching his breath. He was panting slightly. Arthur wasn’t sure if it was from the kiss or coming back to life.

“I thought you were dead,” Arthur said as if that were all the explanation he’d ever need.

“It's fine,” Merlin said, and Arthur’s heart might have stopped itself from those words. “It's more than fine,” Merlin corrected. As if his memory had suddenly come back, Merlin turned to look at Gwen and Gaius as well. “...erm...what happened?” he asked. “The last thing I remember is drinking the wine.”

Arthur looked at the others then, and was met with Gwen’s shocked face, and an approving look from Gaius.

“You kiss him,” Gwen stated.

Arthur glanced to Merlin to see how he was dealing with this news, worried that Merlin would realize that is indeed what just happened and would be angry and disgusted. Merlin was frowning. Arthur’s heart went to his throat.

“It’s about time,” Gaius said. Everyone turned to look at him. He rolled his eyes. “You two have been mooning after each other for far too long,” he continued. “I was beginning to wonder if you’d figure it out on your own at all.”

“After each other,” Arthur repeated slowly. He once again glanced at Merlin. His face was gaining color, specifically a fetching blush.

“I, umm.” Merlin cleared his throat, his breathing still rather heavy.

“I thought-“ Gwen said, pausing to look at Merlin. There was disappointment there, Arthur noticed.

“Oh, no,” Merlin said, eyes widening. “I never meant to make you think-“

Arthur then realized exactly what kind of affection Gwen had held for Merlin. He felt his possessive streak rise, and the urge to kiss Merlin again surged within him. Just to make a point. Gwen couldn’t have Merlin. Merlin was his. Arthur didn’t share.

“I thought you knew,” Merlin said to Gwen. “I’m so obvious.” He sounded sheepish. “I’ve always- for Arthur-“

Arthur’s eyes snapped to Merlin. He wanted to hear the rest of that sentence. Gwen, he noted, was looking between the two of them. Then she looked to Gaius.

“For how long?” she asked.

“I’d say since ‘do you know how to walk on your knees,’” Arthur answered for Gaius. “But truthfully, it might have been earlier.

“Thought that was a bit suggestive,” Merlin mused.

“I can’t believe I never saw it,” Gwen said, shaking her head slightly. “Well at least that makes sense of those odd looks you two would give each other,” she said, trying to make light of the situation.

Arthur cleared his throat. “Yes, well,” he said, looking to the ground. He rolled his shoulders, the situation settling on him as things quieted down and it was apparent that Merlin would be just fine.

“Arthur?” Merlin’s voice came, tentative.

Arthur looked up at him.

“Does this mean… Are we... Do you… that is-“ Merlin struggled to find the right words. Arthur held his breath to hear him ask it.

“Perhaps we should give these two some privacy?” Gaius suggested to Gwen, eyebrows raised pointedly. Gwen blushed a bit and nodded.

“I’ll check in on you later,” she told Merlin, giving him a caring smile. “Sire,” she said with a small curtsey to Arthur, who in turn nodded respectfully.

Arthur and Merlin waited for Gaius and Gwen to leave, not looking at each other or moving until they heard the door shut. Even then, neither of them said a word. Arthur breathed slow and calm, more calmly than he thought he would ever be able to in this kind of situation. Not that he’d thought about it.

Merlin in turn was just catching his breath. He moved first, wiping the sweat from his forehead and then the rest of his face. As if realizing he was a mess, he pulled at the material, a grimace on his face. He shifted his weight on the cot, pushing himself to sit up further.

“You need a bath,” Arthur stated.

“Yeah, I feel disgusting,” Merlin agreed.

“Come to my chambers,” Arthur said without thinking. “I’ll send someone for the water, and you can bathe in my chambers. The bath is much larger than what you have, I’m sure.” Merlin looked unsure. “It’s not a problem, Merlin. You need it.”

“Who’ll you ask to get the water? You can’t just order a random servant. You’re supposed to be in down in the dungeons in your cell,” Merlin pointed out.

“Guinevere then,” Arthur said.

Merlin looked at him for a long calculating moment. Arthur thought he’d refuse, but instead Merlin just sighed and pushed himself off the bed. Merlin didn’t stay vertical for long. His legs were weak, and he fell forward. Arthur lunged forward and caught him around the waste.

“ _Mer_ lin, you idiot,” Arthur said.

“Sorry,” Merlin said, arms having gone around Arthur’s shoulders. “Must not be strong enough to walk yet,” he deducted. A frown came to his face as he looked towards the door. “How’ll we get back to your chambers, without anyone seeing us, if I can barely walk?”

“You can’t walk,” Arthur pointed out, rolling his eyes. “You can barely stand.”

“Exactly.”

Arthur sighed. Merlin was right, of course. Arthur tried to think of something else. He knew the castle inside and out. He knew every single way to his chambers, the unconventional ones included. He could lead the way, but if Merlin couldn’t walk, that complicated things. He’d have to…

“ARTHUR!” Merlin squawked as the blond picked him up and threw him over his shoulder in one fluid motion. Merlin flailed in protest, but Arthur didn’t release him or loosen his grip.

“Fastest way, Merlin,” Arthur told him. “Now shut up. I might be able to get us through a quieter path than the usual, but if you keep yelling you’ll announce us to all of Camelot.”

“I’m not some sack of grain!” Merlin protested.

Despite Merlin not being able to see him, Arthur rolled his eyes at him before he started walking to the door. Merlin was so light. He’d always been skinny, but this was shockingly so, Arthur thought. Merlin hadn’t been able to eat for a few days, and the effects of the poison must have made the little body fat Merlin did have melt off him.

As Arthur opened the door, he vowed to make sure Merlin put that weight back on, and then some.

“Sire?” Gaius asked.

He and Gwen were standing just down the hall. Arthur made his way over to them, Merlin attempting to twist in his arms. Arthur huffed in annoyance before explaining what they were doing. Gaius agreed that the bath would do Merlin good.

“Perhaps put some of those oils in that I gave you for particularly tough training sessions,” Gaius recommended. “His muscles are most likely far too tense, even if he doesn’t realize it.”

“Of course,” Arthur nodded, and turned to Gwen. “Could you bring the water up to my chambers?”

“I’ll go right now,” she said. “See you soon, Merlin,” she said.

“Bye!” Merlin answered, and Arthur could feel that Merlin had raised his hand to wave her off. The idiot.

“Right, I’ll send him back down later tonight,” Arthur told Gaius. “That is, if he can walk by then,” he added. Gaius smiled in amusement.

“His strength will take some time to come back,” Gaius said, “but as long as he is fed, and drinks, he should be fine in a couple days.”

“So does this mean I actually get a day off?” Merlin asked, trying once more to twist his body. Arthur purposefully threw him up higher onto his shoulder. Merlin let out a yelp.

“ _Mer_ lin,” Arthur said. “Do you want us to get caught? We haven’t even left Gaius yet.”

“A little warning then next time,” Merlin replied.

“I think it best you two get going,” Gaius stated. “Behave, Merlin,” he said, giving a pointed look to the mop of black hair before making his way inside.

As the door shut, Arthur sighed and headed through the halls to his chambers.

***~*~*~***

They made it with relatively few problems. Arthur almost dropped Merlin a couple times, which Merlin had no problem pointing out, rather loudly. Merlin asked a lot of questions. Mostly about what happened. Arthur answered as best he could in a quiet voice, keeping an ear out for guards.

When they got to his chambers, Arthur dumped Merlin on the bed, sighing as he rolled his shoulders. Merlin was light, but he was still an entire person that Arthur had just carried up multiple flights of stairs and through winding passages.

“Oh, Gwen must have been up already,” Merlin said, his head twisted at an odd angle as he looked around the room. The bathtub was already in place, just missing the water.

“Right, let’s get you undressed,” Arthur said.

“What?!”

Arthur raised an eyebrow at Merlin’s voice, which had jumped up a couple octaves.

“For your bath?” Arthur prompted.

“I can undress myself, thank you.”

“You can barely stand.”

“I don’t have to stand to undress!”

Ignoring him, Arthur started pulling off Merlin’s boots. Merlin tried to kick him, but didn’t have the energy so he ended up just nudging Arthur in the chest.

“Kicking the prince?” Arthur said, looking at Merlin in amusement. “That’s close to treason.”

Arthur pulled off the other boot as Merlin pouted in annoyance. Once those were off, and the socks too, he went for Merlin’s shirt.

“Get off,” Merlin said, attempting to twist and turn out of Arthur’s grip. He made himself get further into the middle of the bed, ruffling Arthur’s duvet in the process. He was a wiggling worm, and it made Arthur stumble as he tried to grab hold of the disgusting tunic.

“ _Mer_ lin,” Arthur warned.

“Stop it,” Merlin responded. “I can do it,” he added.

“No you can’t,” Arthur replied.

Merlin pouted once more, and twisted a bit more out of Arthur’s grip. With a huff, Arthur got up on the bed, kneeling over Merlin.

“Keep still,” he ordered.

Merlin didn’t reply, but he did let Arthur get hold of his tunic finally. With several tugs, and some shimmying on Merlin’s part, Arthur was able to get the tunic off him. He threw it to the ground to join the boots and socks.

Arthur could see Merlin’s ribs. He reached out and traced one, noting Merlin’s shiver as he did so. His eyes darted to Merlin’s face, but Merlin was looking up at the bed canopy. At least he’d stopped squirming.

Next was his breeches.

 Arthur pulled at the laces, and tried to slide them down. Merlin didn’t bother helping, instead choosing to lay perfectly still and pretend nothing was happening. Arthur held Merlin’s hips lightly and pushed the material down. When they wouldn’t move anymore, he tugged on the breeches in hopes that Merlin would get the hint. He didn’t.

Sighing, Arthur just lifted Merlin’s hips himself, pulling the breeches over Merlin’s arse. He was fully aware of the hitch in Merlin’s breathing as a result. The breeches came off easily after that, and soon Merlin was laying naked on his bed, Arthur still kneeling over him. Arthur kept his eyes on Merlin’s protruding ribs.

“Arthur?” Merlin asked quietly, carefully.

Arthur looked up and met Merlin’s blue gaze. Merlin’s head was tilted to the side, a curious crease between his brows, as he looked back at Arthur unsure. Arthur’s eyes darted to Merlin’s raindrop lips, and he felt his own mouth go a bit dry. He licked his lips automatically, and was more than happy to see Merlin’s eyes widen just a fraction and his pupils dilate.

Arthur stretched out a bit, letting his body slide forward and down until his chest was a few inches from Merlin’s own. Their faces were aligned, and Arthur could feel Merlin’s breath on his face.

The sound of the door opening automatically broke the moment.

“Oh,” Gwen said, stopped dead by the door, two large buckets of steaming water in hand. Her eyes darted between Merlin and Arthur, and her cheeks went a bit red. “I can come back later,” she suggested, voice light and eyes averting.

“No,” Arthur said, scrambling back and off Merlin. He threw a blanket over Merlin’s naked body, and cleared his throat. “That won’t be necessary,” he said, righting his shirt and glancing at Merlin.

Merlin was frozen in place.

“I’ll just…” Gwen looked to the bath as she trialed off.

“Yes, of course,” Arthur replied, as authoritative sounding as possible.

He watched as Gwen dumped the buckets into the bath. The steam rose off them nicely, and Arthur knew it would be the perfect temperature. Merlin would be thankful.

Gwen hesitated by the bath.

“Does he need help getting in?” she asked.

“No,” Arthur said a bit sharper than he meant to.

It pulled small smile from Gwen, who gave Merlin a glance.

“Right then,” she said, picking up the buckets. “I’ll just go.” At the door, she stopped and turned to look at Merlin. “I’ll drop by Gaius’s chambers tomorrow to check on you,” she said, “will that be all right?”

Merlin finding his voice, managed to reply, “Yes,” and even added a “Thank you,” at the end. Gwen smiled with a nod and left.

“Let’s get you in this bath,” Arthur said after the door clicked shut.

“I think I can make it,” Merlin said.

“I’m not taking the chances,” Arthur replied. “The last thing I need is to call Gaius up here because you fell and knocked yourself out.” Merlin looked ready to protest, but Arthur wasn’t having it. “Come on,” he said, pulling the cover off Merlin.

“Arthur!” Merlin tried, but Arthur ignored him. He helped Merlin sit up, and put an arm under him. 

“Lean on me,” he told him.

For once, Merlin did as he was told. Arthur stood up, practically dragging Merlin with him. Merlin’s knees tried to give out a couple times, but they managed to walk the short distance to the bath. Arthur knew Merlin wouldn’t be able to climb in, so he, without warning, picked him up and quickly deposited him in.

“Oi!” Merlin squawked, squirming.

“Shut up,” Arthur ordered.

He picked up the soap and started to wash Merlin’s hair. Merlin let him, staying quiet and perfectly still. Arthur didn’t say anything more, and neither did he. He washed Merlin’s hair, his fingers massaging the scalp and running through the thick black strands. Slowly, Merlin started to relax.

That was, until Arthur moved on to his back.

“I can do that,” Merlin said, sitting up.

“You can’t reach,” Arthur replied, his voice a little hoarser than he wanted it to be. “Do your front then,” he said to cover it up.

He started to wash Merlin’s shoulders first as Merlin worked on his chest. He then went down his spine, which every ridge was clearly visible. Arthur made a mental note to make sure he watched Merlin eat at least one meal a day. Maybe he could eat breakfast with him. Merlin brought it up anyway; he could just bring two up. Or if that wasn’t possible, he could bring a large plate up and they could both eat it.

“Arthur,” Merlin said.

Arthur paused, and it registered how far down his hand had gone. Fully submerged in the water, his sleeves wet, the tips of his fingers were dangerously close to grazing Merlin’s arse. Arthur’s breath left him in a huff.

He stroked one finger across the top of Merlin’s arse, and was pleased to hear the sharp intake of breath. He did it once more, and elicited a soft moan.

“Arthur,” Merlin said again. He turned in the tub, the water sloshing around. Arthur, who hadn’t moved, ended up with Merlin coming face to face with him, a few inches apart. Merlin’s blue eyes were nearly fully taken over by his pupils. “Arthur,” he repeated, voice a whisper.

Arthur closed the distance between their lips delicately. His lips grazed Merlin’s softly, feeling the plush flesh beneath his. Merlin’s breath was hot on his lips, and with his eyes closed, Arthur moved his lips to brush gently across Merlin’s top lip. A desperation took Arthur then, and he gave in to the urge to feel Merlin’s mouth fully.

He captured Merlin’s lips, slotting their mouths and sealing the kiss. Merlin’s lips felt like everything that was right. A core part of Arthur knew it. He had thought he knew what perfect meant, and that he had felt perfect before. Kissing Merlin, though, made him realize how much he had been settling. This was perfect.

Arthur found himself helplessly licking Merlin’s bottom lip, not meaning to ask for entry, but just out of sheer need to taste. Merlin opened up regardless. He pulled Arthur’s tongue into his mouth, coiling his own around it in a sweet caress.

The inside of Merlin’s mouth was hot and wet. Arthur lapped into Merlin’s mouth, relishing the feeling of his tongue. His hand had made it into Merlin’s wet hair, and he noted that Merlin hand one cupping his jaw. It was an amazing feeling.

When they pulled away to breathe, Merlin’s eyes were still closed. He kept his hand in place, and once he got his breath back, was pulling Arthur back to him. Arthur let him without hesitation.

They kissed for Arthur doesn’t know how long. It felt like hours and seconds at the same time. He never wanted to stop, but there was a too strong yearn in him for more. Unsure if this was a mutual need, Arthur let Merlin decide as he reached his hand back into the tub and stroked Merlin’s arse deliberately.

Merlin gasped away from the kiss with a breathy, “Arthur.”

Wanting to be sure, Arthur did it again, dipping a finger lower.

“Yes,” Merlin said, eyes closed and head tilted. “Please.”

“Bed,” Arthur said.

“Wet,” Merlin countered.

“You can get me new sheets later.”

“Prat.”

“Shut up and kiss me, Merlin,” Arthur said and Merlin did just that.

Arthur pulled him up, hoisting Merlin by his arse, and delighting in the fact that he was cupping Merlin’s arse in the process. He hummed into Merlin’s mouth.

When Merlin was out of the tub, Arthur picked him up bridal style. He would have made a quip about Merlin being a girl, but his tongue had far more better things to do. He laid Merlin on the bed, crawling over his wet body as he did.

Merlin’s hands travelled down Arthur’s body as they kissed. Arthur returned the favor by stroking Merlin’s neck, down to his sides, then back up to his chest. Merlin made small moans into his mouth, and it set Arthur alight.

Arthur let his fingers sweep over a nipple, and Merlin responded beautifully. He did it again, coaxing the small thing to attention. Merlin’s back arched into the touch, and his breathing once again fell labored.

“Should you be doing this?” Arthur asked, an attempt to show restraint. Merlin had after all, been dying until an hour or so ago.

“I feel fine,” Merlin assured him, and he did seem to be doing all right. Just a bit weak, and far too skinny. Arthur’s finger swept across his nipple again, and with a curious look in his eyes, Arthur bent his head and blew lightly on it. Merlin let out a surprised, “ah,” that turned into low moan as Arthur one upped himself and took the nipple into his mouth.  “More than fine,” Merlin said. “Never better,” he added, and when Arthur looked up, he saw Merlin’s eyes were closed, head tilted back as he arched himself further into Arthur’s mouth.

Arthur pulled off and kissed a trail back up to Merlin’s lips.

It was then that he registered Merlin’s hands on his bare chest. He tried to frown and think of how that happened. He had certainly not stopped to pull his shirt off, and he would remember, he thinks, if Merlin had removed it. He was unable to hold the frown and thought for long as Merlin’s tongue tangled with his own.

That yearning flared up again, and Arthur moved away from Merlin’s lips. He kissed along Merlin’s jaw, feeling the slightest bit of stubble. Somebody must have shaved him while he was sick. Merlin was always clean-shaven, and it would have been a gesture they knew he would appreciate.

It was probably Gwen.

“Uh, Arthur,” Merlin moaned, voice deeper than Arthur had ever heard.

Arthur didn’t realize what he had started doing. He was sucking a bruise onto Merlin’s neck. A solid claim to him, and a warning to others who looked his way. A marking so nobody, Gwen included, ever got any ideas.

It was petty and possessive, but Arthur couldn’t help it. Merlin didn’t seem to mind.

“Gwen was right,” Merlin said, making Arthur pause. Why was Gwen being brought up when Arthur was doing _this_ to him? To make a point, Arthur bit down slightly. Merlin, the idiot, continued anyway. “You are adorable when you’re possessive,” he said. Arthur made some sort of grunting noise as he licked over the sensitive mark he had made. “Jealous,” Merlin added, amusement coloring his voice.

“I am not jealous,” Arthur said, pulling away enough so the words wouldn’t be muffled. His lips grazed Merlin’s skin as he said it, causing a moan to be pulled from Merlin.

“Not even a little?” Merlin asked after a moment.

“ _Mer_ lin,” Arthur warned.

Merlin laughed breathlessly, and Arthur punished him for it by trailing kisses down his neck and stomach, following a line of dark hair to his crotch.

It was the first time Arthur had let himself look. Merlin was smaller than he was, which he noted with childish satisfaction. He wasn’t small though. Arthur’s fingers brushed across the tip, which leaked a clear bead or two. Merlin gasped, head slamming into the bed under him.

“ _Arthur_ ,” he moaned.

Arthur’s fingers travelled down, stroking the silky skin. Once he reached the base, he wrapped his hand around it fully, testing how wide Merlin was compared to himself. He pumped his hand up and down once experimentally.

“Gods,” Merlin said, legs flexing.

“Good?” Arthur asked, hoping he sounded egotistical rather than nervous. He could deal with Merlin calling him a prat.

“Yes,” Merlin said.

“How about this?” Arthur asked with a wicked smile and lowered his mouth to engulf Merlin’s prick.

Merlin arched his back off the bed as he gasped a loud sinful sound. Arthur liked how vocal Merlin turned out to be. He normally didn’t care for loud bed partners, but every sound he got from Merlin set fire to his blood.

Arthur sucked the tip, tonguing the slit for a moment. He bobbed his head down until his nose hit the root. Merlin was moaning continuously. Arthur kept going. He hollowed his cheeks as he sucked on his way up. Merlin’s hands were in his hair.

“Arthur,” Merlin was saying. “Arthur.”

Arthur hummed in response, making Merlin make an odd breathing sound as his back arched. Merlin tasted delicious. Arthur bobbed his head up and down several times. He took merlin down to the base, and Merlin was panting hard. Arthur swallowed.

“ARTHUR!” Merlin yelled.

Arthur expected a flood of salty warmth to fill his mouth, but nothing happened. He glanced up at Merlin to see his eyes squeezed shut.

Sensing his gaze, Merlin’s eyes opened and looked down at Arthur.

“Come here,” Merlin said, voice far too low than safe for Arthur’s will power.

Obliging, Arthur pulled of Merlin’s prick, a trail of saliva coming with him. He wiped his mouth and lay atop Merlin. His hands automatically stroking Merlin’s sides. He kissed the mark on Merlin’s neck.

He froze, however, when he suddenly felt Merlin’s hand grip his own steal hard prick. He had not taken his breeches off. He knew that. He didn’t recall Merlin taking them off, and he was fairly they were there a few minutes ago. It didn’t make sense, but Arthur was completely naked. He just didn’t know when this happened.

All these thoughts were blown away when Merlin lifted his head to whisper in his ear, “Take me, Arthur.”

 Breathing was hard to do, let alone thinking after that. Arthur tried to calm himself down. It was hard with Merlin wiggling underneath him and slowly stroking his prick.

“Are you sure,” Arthur found himself asking.

“Yes,” Merlin replied.

Arthur kissed him.

It wasn’t a long kiss, and Merlin didn’t let go or stop stroking as they did kiss. It was Merlin who pulled back first. Arthur chased his lips but Merlin just smiled back at him. Arthur licked the side of his mouth.

“I should tell you, I’ve never, er…”

Arthur froze.

“Are you telling me that you’re a virgin?” he asked, voice all sorts of not okay. He was surprised anything came out at all and proud that he didn’t just erupt right then. His arousal rocketed at Merlin’s implications, but Arthur needed to be sure.

“Yes?”

Arthur didn’t pull away, didn’t move. Merlin’s hand was still wrapped around him, but it too had stopped.

“Surely with a girl, at least,” Arthur started, “you’ve-“

“-no,” Merlin interrupted.

“How is that possible,” Arthur muttered in disbelief.

“Back in Ealdor we had to work all the time,” Merlin said, a bit defensive. “And it’s not like I’ve had time since I’ve come to Camelot!”

Arthur closed his eyes, letting his head rest in the curve of Merlin’s neck. “ _Mer_ lin, you idiot,” he said. “I meant how is it possible for someone as gorgeous as you to never have…” he trailed off, shaking his head, and then realizing what his lips were close to, giving his mark a soft kiss.

When Merlin didn’t answer, he lifted his head enough to look at him. There was a fetching blush on him; even his ears had gone red. Arthur wanted to see this sight more often.

“So,” Merlin asked, aiming for nonchalance, “does that mean you’re interested?”

Arthur felt a spark of possessive joy flare to life within him. He looked Merlin directly in the eyes, and nodded seriously. Yes. Yes, Arthur would very much like to take Merlin’s virginity. His total virginity.

“Take that as a yes, then,” Merlin joked.

Arthur kissed the idiot. His hands went down to Merlin’s arse, pulling his still wet body to him. Merlin had let go of Arthur’s prick in favor of wrapping his arms around Arthur’s neck. He used the position, and Arthur’s strength, to his advantage and held on to him for support as he thrust against him.

Arthur groaned at the combination of sensations. Merlin’s naked body pressed completely to him, wet and dripping. The body heat soaking into Arthur and the smooth skin sliding against his own. The firm nipples brushing against Arthur’s chest. Their pricks rubbing against each other, friction delicious.

He didn’t actually mean for his finger to slip in between Merlin’s cheeks, and touch his hole. Merlin’s wet body was slippery.

“Yes, Arthur,” Merlin moaned.

Tentatively, Arthur brushed his finger across the hole again. Merlin’s mouth latched on to his own. As Merlin sucked on his tongue, he allowed his finger to keep brushing.

“Merlin,” he said when he managed to break for air. “I need to get something,” he told him. Merlin’s lust clouded eyes didn’t understand, and he tried to reach for Arthur again. Arthur took his arms in hand and lowered them, stroking down them before letting go. “I’ll be right back,” he assured him.

Arthur didn’t go far. In the dresser at the end of his bed was an ornate glass bottle of oil. He picked it up, and opened it, taking a large breath of the aroma. Lavender. 

He walked back over to Merlin, who was now laying in the middle of his bed, one hand on his prick while the other rested on his stomach. He was watching Arthur, and when he spotted the oil, unbelievably, a blush tinged him pink. His movements on his prick stopped.

“Not getting shy on me now, are you?” Arthur teased. He climbed back onto the bed, oil in hand, and kneeled between Merlin’s parted legs. “Open them wider,” he instructed. Merlin complied.

Arthur poured a generous amount of the oil in his palm, coating his fingers well in the process and dripping quite a bit on the sheets below. He placed a hand on Merlin’s hip, his thumb brushing the spot a few times, as he looked Merlin. When the blue eyes met his, he felt a flare inside of himself.

“This might be a bit uncomfortable at first,” he admitted.

“I can take it,” Merlin said automatically.

Arthur smiled.

He parted Merlin’s cheeks, and held his breath as he saw the small pink pucker. Blowing the air out of his lungs at a steady pace, he brushed his finger across it once more. Merlin squirmed on the bed with anticipation. Arthur silently promised he’d make this exquisite for him.

His finger pressed in slowly, and Arthur’s breath was punched out of him. It was so _hot_. Like Merlin had his very own fire inside. It was so tight. Arthur was reminded that Merlin was a virgin and he had to close his eyes. It was so silky.

Arthur wondered if he’d be able to do this. Maybe he’d have to postpone until a time when he wasn’t so excited. What if he barely got in and couldn’t hold back? What if he never got in at all?

“More,” Merlin said.

Arthur hadn’t realized his finger was up to the last knuckle. He pulled it out, watching, mesmerized, at his finger came out of Merlin’s hole. He gulped in a breath only to have it punched back out as he sunk his finger back in.

He thrust his finger into Merlin’s body several times before Merlin’s gasping made it to his ears. He added a second finger, and Merlin’s back arched so hard he was barely touching the bed. Arthur kept thrusting them, letting Merlin feel the stretch.

When he added the third one, a minute or so later, Merlin was babbling nonsense. Arthur’s arm was tiring from the constant finger fucking he was giving Merlin. He twisted them on one inwards thrust, and Merlin yelled out his name.

Arthur had found his prostate.

He stroked the little pleasure button, rejoicing in Merlin’s reactions. One sound in particular almost pulled Arthur over the edge, which told him it was time to go further.

When he took his fingers out of Merlin, he instantly missed the tight heat surrounding them. Merlin moaned sadly, turning his head and opening desperate eyes to look at Arthur.

“Arthur?” he asked.

“If you want me to stop,” Arthur told him, lining himself up, “all you have to do is say.” He mentally prepared himself for what he was about to do. “If you don’t want to, Merlin, it isn’t a problem. Really. You just have to tell me. One word, Merlin. One word and I’ll stop. That’s all-“

“Arthur?” Merlin interrupted.

“Yes?” Arthur held his breath.

“Shut up and take me, you clotpole,” Merlin said.

Arthur laughed. Merlin grinned at him.

Getting past the first ring of muscle was not as hard as Arthur thought. He supposed he had prepared Merlin a bit more than necessary. Merlin was still incredibly hot and tight, but there was an easy give when Arthur pushed forward.

Glorious torture.

He had to stop for a moment. He could feel the coil of orgasm forming and that could not happen right now. He thought of Gaius, his father, that old woman in the market the other day, anything to try to stop his orgasm.

“Arthur,” Merlin whined.

With a little more control, albeit it was barely there, Arthur continued to push. He steadfast refused to listen to the noises Merlin was making lest he undo all Arthur’s self-control. Arthur was good at self-discipline, had it installed into his brain since birth. Merlin, it seemed, could blow that all away as if it was nothing with just a few choice sounds.

Arthur bottomed out finally, and he stayed there panting. He had never felt so utterly _complete_. It took all he could not to sob at the feeling. Arthur wanted to stay there, buried inside Merlin forever. It didn’t take long though, until every bone in his body was telling him to move. Thrust. Take. Claim. Own. Arthur shook with the need, but forced himself to let Merlin get accustomed to feeling this full.

Arthur looked at him then.

Merlin’s eyes were squeezed shut, his mouth gaped open, his hair a ruffled mess. His hands were wrapped up in the sheets either side of him, pulling at the material as he gasped. He was a beautiful mess.

Arthur had almost lost this beautiful mess.

He had lost him. Then he had come back and now here he was, underneath Arthur. He was Arthur’s beautiful mess now. Arthur’s to have and to hold. Arthur’s to protect. Arthur’s to love. Arthur’s to make scream with pleasure.

Arthur bent his head and kissed Merlin.

“Please, Arthur,” Merlin said after a moment, lips brushing against Arthur’s. “I don’t know… I just need…”

“I know what you need,” Arthur said softly.

He pulled out slowly, eyes closed, trying to engrain the sensation into his memory. Merlin whined at the feeling, panting between them. Arthur thrust back in, a little harder than he had intended. A groan was pulled out of him, from deep within his chest.

“Merlin,” he breathed.

He thrust again, and again, and again. His pace picked up, and the strength of his thrusts steadily increased. Merlin’s arms came to wrap around Arthur’s neck once more.

“Yes, Arthur,” Merlin said as Arthur pulled him closer.

He lifted Merlin’s arse into his lap, not stopping the thrust. The new angle allowed him to hit Merlin’s prostate at every thrust. Merlin’s eyes rolled back, eye lashed fluttering.

Arthur fucked into him harder. His breathing was hard, and Merlin and he were quickly starting to break out into a thin layer of sweat. Arthur could feel the bed shaking, but Merlin was now egging him on of all things.

Harder, Arthur.

Faster, Arthur.

_More_ , Arthur.

Arthur was pounding into Merlin by the time he sensed a change in the black haired beauty. Merlin thrashed around on the bed, a constant stream of sounds coming from him. Words becoming noises. Merlin’s hands were scratching at his back, while Merlin arched harder, trying to pull him deeper.

Hammering into him ferociously, Arthur saw Merlin’s prick for a second as he looked down. The slit was leaking constantly, and the head was a deep red. He wasn’t going to last long, and the realization hit Arthur hard.

He was going to make Merlin come.

“Fuck,” he said, his orgasm coiling once more in his stomach.

Suddenly, the warning bells sounded. The guards must have finally realized their young prince was not in his cell anymore. Really, it had taken them far too long, and Arthur would have to talk to them about that in the future. For now, Arthur couldn’t think of such things.

“Arthur,” Merlin said.

“I know,” he replied. “They’ll be heading up here as we speak,” he said.

Merlin shook his head where it was buried against Arthur’s chest. Arthur kept thrusting wildly into him, determined now more than ever to make Merlin come.

“No,” Merlin said, confusing Arthur for a moment. “No, that’s not what I was – ah – going to say,” Merlin continued. Arthur was merciless against his prostate. Merlin couldn’t speak for a moment, just panting and moaning. “I’m so close,” Merlin whispered in near broken desperation.

Arthur went impossibly harder and faster, his hold on Merlin’s hips tighter as the warning bells continued to go off. Holding Merlin to him like he’d protect him from the very sound. Like he’d always protected him. Like he always would protect him.

“Arthur, I love you,” Merlin said breathlessly as his orgasm slammed into him.

Arthur yelled Merlin’s name as his hips stuttered and with one last hard and deep thrust in, Arthur came. Hot ropes of thick come filled Merlin’s arse, and Arthur groaned, absolutely destroyed.

He pulled out of Merlin and flopped on down beside him on the bed. Instantly, he pulled Merlin into his side, rearranging his long, sex warmed, limbs until Merlin was practically laying on top of him. Arthur buried his nose in Merlin’s hair and planted kisses on his head. His arms were around Merlin’s waist, holding him possessively.

“I love you, too,” he whispered.

Arthur nuzzled into Merlin’s hair, nosing his way through the black strands. Merlin smelled like Arthur’s soap and his Merlin-like scent. Taking several deep breathes, Arthur savored the moment of Merlin in his arms, blissfully pliant after what Arthur had to deem the best sex _he’d_ ever had. Merlin’s proof of enjoyment was cooling rapidly between them, and Arthur knew they’d be sticky and uncomfortable if they let it dry for too long.

They needed a bath.

The water was probably lukewarm by now, if not a little cool. The tub, however, was large enough for them both. It gave Arthur _ideas_.

He leaned down, tilting Merlin’s head up as he did so, and captured Merlin’s mouth in a kiss.

Merlin responded back lazily, his hands moving to hold Arthur’s arms around his waist. His tongue danced with Arthur’s, and he made a small sound of pleasure into the kiss. Arthur groaned his approval back, thumb stroking gently on Merlin’s hip.

“There he is!” a male voice yelled as the door burst open, slamming back against the wall.

Arthur pulled away from Merlin quickly, eyes snapping up to see several knights had barged into the room. A flash of outrage took hold of him as he whipped a sheet over Merlin’s naked and vulnerable body.

“What is the meaning of this?!” he yelled, eyes flashing in anger.

“Sire-“

“Get out!” Arthur ordered sharply, every bit of him tense and daring them to defy him. He might be naked, and on the heels of a fantastic orgasm and after bliss of cuddling up to Merlin, but he could still take them down one by one if he needed to.

“By order of the king-“ the Knight tried again.

“I said _get._ _out_ ,” Arthur seethed. Merlin had not moved, and was now looking at Arthur in abject horror. Arthur kept his arm firmly in place over Merlin’s waist, keeping his eyes glued to the knights.

“Arthur!” his father’s voice called from outside. The steps of the king could be heard echoing in the halls outside. “Where is my son?” he asked as he got closer. The muffled words of a knight drifted into the room, and Uther’s pace quickened.

When Uther came into the room, his pale eyes narrowed in on Merlin’s form. His face void of any outright emotion, but his posture was rigid. His eyes widened slightly as he was able to confirm suspicions he had had for a while now. Then, with a cold voice, not looking at Arthur, he ordered the knights to seize Merlin.

“No!” Arthur yelled, tightening his hold on Merlin and not letting go.

“I want him executed at dawn,” Uther stated as the knights moved to Merlin.

“You can’t do this!” Arthur exclaimed. “Father, please!”

Uther’s head snapped up, and his eyes now looked directly at Arthur, hard and cruel. “I will deal with you later,” he said in an ominous and calm tone. As Merlin was wrenched from Arthur’s hands, Uther glared at him, a look of deep disgust in his eyes.

“Merlin!” Arthur yelled as the knights pulled him from the room.

“Arthur!” Merlin yelled back, his body still weak from the poison and struggling to stay upright. The knights ended up mostly dragging him across the room, paying no attention to Merlin’s naked state. Arthur saw red.

“Unhand him!” he ordered furiously.

“Find the whore some clothes,” Uther told them.

Arthur’s eyes darted to his father at the words before going back to Merlin.

Merlin was looking greatly conflicted over something as he looked back at Arthur. He was no longer trying to get out of the knights grasp, but there was a familiar look in his eyes that made Arthur nervous for some reason. He wanted to tell Merlin not to do anything. That he would get him out. That he would never let them harm him. He wanted to promise Merlin he’d be safe.  However, at that moment, Arthur knew the best way to keep Merlin safe now was to keep quiet. 

Arthur also noticed how tired Merlin looked. The exhaustion showing around his eyes, and how he barely held himself up. Had they not been interrupted, Merlin and he would have drifted off to sleep in each other’s arms. Merlin would have gotten the sleep he needed, and had Arthur there to protect him. He would have awoken with Arthur’s kisses, feeling refreshed.

Arthur watched in despair as Merlin was carried out of the room.

“Leave us,” Uther ordered the knights.

When they were alone, Arthur standing by his bed, Uther in the middle of the room, silence stretched between them for several long seconds. Arthur watched the door, unable to full process what had just happened in a matter of minutes.

“Do you like making a fool of me?” Uther broke the silence.

Arthur didn’t respond, his jaw locking.

“You are the future king, Arthur,” Uther told him. “You have responsibilities, expectations,” he continued. Arthur remained where he was, mute and unmoving. “You disobeyed me, putting your life in danger, Camelot’s _future_ in danger, for a single servant.” Uther was staring at him in disappointment and disbelief. “I can understand the urges you have,” Uther said, and Arthur did not want to think about that let alone comment, “but _this_ ,” Uther continued, gesturing to the bed. “This is beyond reckless.”

Arthur refused to look at his father. He knew it was reckless. He knew he was the prince, the next king, Camelot’s future. He knew all this but he couldn’t stop himself from what he felt. He had tried, gods help him, he tried. Seeing Merlin die in front of him had made him realize that he couldn’t deny it anymore.

“This will not happen again,” Uther told him. “You should have listened to me earlier, Arthur. The boy will be executed tomorrow morning, and you will be there.” Arthur felt his heart stop, his eyes going to his father in horror. “You will be there,” Uther repeated firmly, “and you will watch and learn that your actions have consequences.”

Arthur’s chest heaved at his father’s words. His eyes were blurring with tears, and he could feel himself start to tremble. He wasn’t sure if it was out of sorrow or anger. 

“You can’t take him away from me,” Arthur said, heart empty and voice hollow.

“What did you expect?” Uther asked him coldly. “He’s a servant, your _manservant_. Did you think you could marry?” Uther asked in a mocking tone. Arthur flinched. “This is not a child’s story, Arthur. There is no ending where you and he fall in love and live the rest of your lives as king and consort.”

“We are in love,” Arthur said before he could stop himself.

Uther froze, looking at him in shock. Then he was moving, walking closer to Arthur like a predator to its pray. Arthur stood up straighter, standing his ground.

“You will marry a noble woman that I deem suitable enough. You will produce an heir with this woman. You will rule this kingdom with her as your queen. You will forget these silly and childish dreams of true love and choices,” Uther told him. “You will not embarrass me again,” Uther stated.

When Arthur didn’t respond, his glare hardened.

“Yes, sire,” Arthur replied emotionlessly.

Uther spun and stormed out without another word.

Arthur fell to the bed, curling in on himself as silent tears rolled down his cheeks.

***~*~*~***

Gwen was looking at the dirt ground in her cell when the door to the cell beside hers swung open and Merlin was shoved in. He had a thin shirt and a torn pair of breeches on. He fell to the ground with a gasp of pain. The cell door was shut and locked soon after, and the guard’s footsteps sounded as he walked away.

“Merlin,” she called quietly, rushing to the iron bars that separated them.

“Gwen?” Merlin asked, his bright blue eyes looking up at her in confusion. “What are you doing here?”

“I had to knock a guard out to break Arthur out,” she replied sheepishly.

“You knocked a knight of Camelot out?” Merlin grinned at her. 

“Yes, well, they didn’t take it very well,” she said, a smile playing at her lips. Merlin’s smile was infectious. It was one of the reasons she’d developed a bit of an infatuation with him.  She cleared frowned at him, asking, “What are _you_ doing here?”

“Uther found Arthur and me in his chambers,” Merlin answered, and by his tone, Gwen knew there was a lot more to that. Actually, if his tone was anything to go by…

“Oh,” she said in realization, a blush heating her cheeks.

“Uther’s sentenced be to death by dawn,” Merlin said, his voice quieting.

Gwen looked at him sadly. She’d been sentenced to two weeks in the cell, which was rather lighter than she thought she would get. She thought it might have to do with Morgana.

“Oh, Merlin,” she said.

They were silent for some time until Merlin spoke again.

“Gwen?” he asked.

“Yes?”

“Could you promise me something?”

“Anything.”

“Look after Arthur?” he asked, meeting her gaze. Gwen’s heart broke at it. “He gets in more trouble than possible really,” Merlin said. “More than anyone realizes. A lot of people want to harm him, and now I won’t be there to keep him safe.” Merlin stopped, his voice gone rough, and he swallowed a few times. “I need to know someone will look after him.”

“Of course,” Gwen said. She felt useless.

“And Gwen?” Merlin said.

“Yes?”

“Before I die, I want you to know something.”

Gwen frowned at the trepidation in Merlin’s voice. He looked around, making sure it was just them. When his eyes met hers, they were vulnerable and he looked scared.

“I’ve got magic,” Merlin admitted.

Gwen almost laughed. It was all she could do to shake her head with a smile on her face. It caused Merlin to frown in confusion, which made her smile a little bit wider at him.

“Merlin, I know you have magic,” she said quietly.

“What? How?” Merlin asked, sitting up straighter and worry entering his eyes.

“My father?” Gwen said, “When that plague came?” she prompted. A look of recognition started to come across Merlin’s face. “He just miraculously got better,” she continued, “and you were the only one who knew.” She smiled. “Thank you for that,” she said.

“I-“

“Oh, come on, Merlin,” she laughed lightly. “You didn’t expect your claim to being psychic to actually throw me off, did you?”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Merlin asked.

Gwen shrugged lightly. “I trusted you to tell me when you were ready,” she said honestly. “It’s not something anyone would want to admit casually in Camelot.” She glanced around the dungeons. “Not that it seemed to make a difference,” she sighed.

“Do you think Arthur knows?” Merlin asked.

Gwen snorted at the question.

“Arthur is only observant with a sword,” she said. “He’s got no clue, I’d say,” she told him with a sad smile.

“Do you think he’d look at me any different if he knew?”

“Well he would certainly think twice at making you clean his boots until the early hours of the morning,” Gwen said with a smile.

Merlin laughed, but it came out just a bit too forced.

“Merlin!” Morgana’s voice came then.

Gwen and Merlin looked up to see her standing before their cells, a look of light outrage on her face.

“Gwen,” Morgana acknowledged. “Don’t worry, you’ll be out before the end of the week,” she promised, and Gwen had no doubts about it. She turned her attention to Merlin. “This is unacceptable,” she said. “Uther won’t listen to reason, but I won’t let this happen, Merlin,” she told him.

“I don’t think anything can be done,” Merlin said.

“There is always something that can be done,” Morgana said, a firm nod accompanying her words. “I’ll speak to Arthur,” she told him. Merlin hurt a little at hearing the name. Morgana leaned forward, her voice so quiet that Merlin and Gwen could barely hear her. “We’ll figure something out,” she said.

Merlin smiled sadly at her.

“At least Bayard will be cleared, and Camelot won’t have to go to war,” he said.

Gwen almost rolled her eyes. It was so like Merlin to find the silver lining in every situation.

Eyes widening, Morgana looked like she had just come to an epiphany. Merlin cocked an eyebrow at her, but she didn’t explain. Instead, she cleared her throat and schooled her face. They locked eyes for a moment, and Gwen knew that there was something cooking in her lady’s mind. Morgana looked at Merlin then, a soft smile playing on her lips.

“I know what you two feel for each other,” she said to Merlin, “and I want you to know that I will always support that. I’m here for the both of you.” Merlin looked at her in shock. “Your love for each other is stronger than anything Uther can understand,” she told him.

With that she left.

“Merlin?” Gwen asked as Morgana disappeared down the hall.  Merlin looked at her, his face tinged with a blush. Gwen found herself smiling, and wished she could reach out and hold his hand. “I’m happy for you,” she said, truly meaning it.

“Thank you,” Merlin answered eyes shyly on the ground.

“It actually explains quite a few things, really,” she said, sitting back on her heels, thinking over the little things in the past that had seemed rather odd at the time. Merlin tilted his head in question at her. She smiled. “Arthur’s a bit possessive of you, isn’t he?” she said.

“I don’t think so,” Merlin said, looking unsure.

“You know,” Gwen went on, “when that plague hit, before my father had fallen ill,” Gwen explained, “I ran into Arthur in the halls.”

Merlin looked confused again.

“He was rather rude, actually,” Gwen continued. “He was coming from the direction of you chambers, and he said something about a flower,” she smiled, remembering the awkward moment when she’d given it to Merlin, how flustered she’d been afterwards. She always did seem to make a mess of things when she was around someone she was a bit smitten with. “Do you remember the lavender I gave you?” she asked him.

Merlin nodded slowly.

“At the time I was completely confused as to why he was being so,” she searched for the right word, “hostile,” she settled on after a pause, “towards me.” She shrugged her eyebrows. “Of course, after word got out about the plague, I assumed he had been overly stressed about his people dying.”

“Arthur didn’t know until later that day,” Merlin interrupted to point out. Gwen gave him a half smile.

“I know,” she said. “Well, I know now,” she amended. She smiled wider at Merlin’s furrowed brow. “I think he was a bit jealous,” she told him.

“Arthur?” Merlin asked. “No.”

“There have been other times,” Gwen said, ignoring him. “Odd looks here and there. A few words, some questionably actions,” she trailed off. “It always revolved around you, now that I look back.” She laughed at Merlin’s wide-eyed expression. “He’s rather possessive of you,” she smiled.

Merlin was bright red, looking at the ground as he took the information in.

They were quiet for some time then. Merlin seemed to be doing an awful lot of thinking. Gwen let him. She sat back against the wall, not moving even when the cell door opened and a servant came with supper. She uttered a quiet thank you, hearing Merlin do the same as he took his food.

They ate in silence. The bread was stale, but the water was cool. Merlin ate all of his food quickly, frowning down at it when it was all gone. Gwen sighed and got up with her plate. She kneeled at the bars, and picked up the remaining piece of bread on her plate. She offered it through the bars.

“Take it,” she said. Merlin shook his head. “Merlin, you need to eat to get your strength back,” she said, pushing her arm further towards him. “Take it.”

“You need to eat, too,” Merlin said.

“I’ll be fine,” she told him. “Eat.”

Merlin smiled that shy smile he had, and took it. “Thank you,” he said before taking a bite.

Gwen smiled triumphantly at him. She watched, making sure he ate it all. When he did, she went back to leaning against the wall. Merlin drank his water and sighed, wiping his mouth.

“I don’t think I can sleep,” he said. He laughed somewhat bitterly. “Not that it really matters,” he said. “I suppose I should try. Wouldn’t want to be tired at my own execution,” he joked.

“Merlin,” Gwen said. She didn’t want to hear him talk like that.

“I’ll say goodbye tomorrow,” Merlin said. “Before they take me,” he said. “I’ll wake you up, if that’s all right. It might be a little selfish,” he said with a sad smile, “but I’d really like to say goodbye.”

“Oh, Merlin,” Gwen sighed. She moved again to the bars. She leaned against them, her hand outstretched for Merlin to take. He would not spend his last night alone. Gwen would make sure he knew he was loved.

“Goodnight, Gwen,” Merlin said, taking her hand.

“Goodnight, Merlin.”

***~*~*~***

Arthur was pacing in Gaius’s chambers. The old physician was standing tiredly by a large shelf of books, a grave expression on his face as he watched Arthur think. It was late into the night, supper had come and gone long ago, but neither of them could even think to fall asleep.

“There must be something we can do,” Arthur said.

“Sire, the king’s mind is made up,” Gaius said. “I truthfully do not see a way we can save him,” he said sadly.

“I won’t let this happen!” Arthur said. “I will not stand by and watch him die.”

“Then we better get a plan together quickly,” Morgana said from the doorway.

“My lady,” Gaius acknowledged with a respectful head nod.

“Gaius,” she said. Arthur, arms crossed in front of his chest, one hand on his chin, looked at her in open surprise. “Arthur,” she started, “I’ve just been to see Merlin.”

Arthur swallowed at the name, his skin prickling.

“And I think I’ve got a plan.”

“What?” Arthur asked, perking up a bit.

“Uther has not released Bayard yet, has he?” At Arthur’s shaking head, she nodded. “Good, that’s crucial.”

“What does Bayard have to do with anything?” Gaius asked.

Morgana looked at him, smiling. “Bayard is known to take loyalty quite seriously. If he hears that Merlin, who poisoned himself for his prince, is going to be put to death for it, he would think rather ill of Camelot,” she explained. “And of Uther himself, specifically.”

“How can we be sure he’d demand Merlin’s life spared?” Gaius asked.

“We can’t,” Arthur answered for Morgana, the spark of hope leaving his eyes. “My father would not release Merlin to save face in front of him,” Arthur added. “Not when it is to teach me, and the people of Camelot a lesson.”

“I think you’re underestimating Bayard’s power in this situation,” Morgana said. “Uther almost started a war by locking him and his people up-“

“Which would have been justified if he had been the one to try to poison me,” Arthur interrupted to point out.

“-but now that it’s proven that he is innocent, Bayard could still declare war on Camelot for his troubles,” Morgana continued, ignoring Arthur. “Uther needs Bayard to forgive this misunderstanding, and go home without intention of attacking Camelot at all. Bayard’s men are already on their way as a result of hearing of his imprisonment in the first place,” Morgana added. “Bayard would be being released to meet his army a day’s walk from the outer towns.”

Arthur had paused during her speech, thinking it over. The more she explained, the more he was starting to be swayed, and Morgana must have sensed it, as she kept going.

“If we can convince Bayard to see Merlin’s life being spared as the ultimate action Camelot can do to show their worth, then we can force Uther to stop the execution.”

“What about once Bayard has left?” Gaius piped up.

Morgana turned to him. “That’s where the rest of my plan comes into play,” she said, a wicked smile on her face.

Arthur’s eyes narrowed at her in suspicion.

“There’s more?” he asked.

“To convince Bayard that Merlin’s life matters for more a reason than his loyalty to you, and to assure Merlin’s death is something that Bayard would be notified of as soon as possible,” Morgana said, her smile widening, “We’ll have Merlin made your husband.”

Arthur gaped at her.

Morgana walked to him, taking his hands in her own. “It’s perfect, Arthur,” she said, looking him in the eyes. “This way Uther wouldn’t be able to kill him without the whole kingdom, and every other one, knowing. Killing Merlin would _mean_ something then.”

Arthur couldn’t find the words to express what he felt. Mainly because he didn’t know how he felt.

“This way you two can be together as well,” Morgana smiled smugly.

“It’s not a bad plan, sire,” Gaius said, sounding rather impressed.

“What about an heir?” Arthur asked, voice a little croaky.

“I’m sure you could find a surrogate,” Morgana waved off.

“Father wouldn’t allow it,” Arthur said, not mentioning that he himself would never go through with such a plan. “It wouldn’t be legitimate. Its claim to the throne could be questioned. My devotion to Merlin, too.”

“We’ll find a way, Arthur,” Morgana said, a bit annoyed with Arthur. This was a good plan, and he was ruining her excitement with his worrying.

Gaius shifted uncomfortably at the words. At the possible implications as to how that way might come about. Morgana and Arthur didn’t notice, they were too busy staring each other down.

“You really think will work?” Arthur asked.

Morgana nodded.

“What if Merlin says no?” Arthur asked.

“I don’t think that’ll be a problem,” Gaius said, a bit amused.

Arthur nodded, still unsure, but not in the mood to argue. Or talk about his feelings and how much Merlin’s rejection could hurt him. “All right,” he said. “First we’ll need to speak to Bayard,” Arthur said.

“First you need to propose to Merlin,” Morgana corrected him. She was enjoying this far too much. “I’ll deal with Bayard,” she told him.

“I’m forbidden to see Merlin,” Arthur said.

“Find a way,” Morgana said, rolling her eyes.

Arthur sighed, dragging a hand down his face. “Fine,” he said, and headed for the door. He paused, and looked back at Morgana. “Thank you,” he said. Morgana smiled at him.

“Good luck, sire,” Gaius said.

Arthur smiled nervously and walked out.

***~*~*~***

It was easier than he thought it would be to get into the dungeons. The knights had tried to stop him at first, of course. Arthur managed to assure them he was just saying goodbye. It was partly true. If this didn’t work, this would be Arthur’s last chance to say goodbye.

The guards seemed to take pity on him, and let him pass.

Arthur walked through the dungeons, passing empty cells and wondering if Morgana was already down here talking to Bayard. As he walked, Arthur thought about how he would ask Merlin. Should he come right out and ask? Should he prepare a speech, one that spoke of love and devotion? Should he tell Merlin of the plan? Would that make him think this was just that? A plan to save his life, and not really Arthur asking him to spend the rest of his life with him. Arthur did want that. It was partly why he both liked and disliked this plan. This should not be how he asked Merlin to marry him. It was, however, the only chance they had now.

Arthur came across Merlin’s cell and stopped.

Merlin was slumped against the iron bars of his cell, his head dipped down as he breathed steadily. Gwen was in the cell beside him, in a similar position. They were holding hands through the bars.

Arthur swallowed at the sight, feeling a mix of emotions.

He approached Merlin’s cell and squatted down. He watched Merlin’s face for a moment, memorizing the calm look he had when asleep. The cell was dark, but a sliver of moonlight made its way through the barred window above. By now, Merlin was all dry and fully clothed. The clothes they had put him in were far too loose. Merlin shivered, and it made Arthur want to pull him close onto his chest.

If this plan worked, he could wake up every day besides Merlin and do that very thing.

Arthur cleared his throat to awaken both Merlin and Gwen. Gwen awoke first. She blinked her dark brown eyes at him, and upon realizing who it was, let go of Merlin’s hand quickly. She pushed herself away from the bars, looking guilty.

The action jolted Merlin from his sleep.

“Gwen?” Merlin asked, voice sleepy.

Arthur couldn’t help his jaw tense.

“Merlin,” Arthur said.

Merlin’s widened blue eyes found him in the dark. A smile sprung to his lips, and it filled Arthur with warmth. Merlin stood up, staring at Arthur for a moment before walking to the door of the cell.

“How did you get in?” he asked.

“I told them I wanted to say goodbye,” Arthur said honestly. Merlin’s smile faltered and a look of sorrow filled his eyes as he swallowed. “Merlin,” Arthur started, but paused when he realized he hadn’t actually though of what he would say once he got to Merlin. He looked into Merlin’s loving eyes, and started speaking again. “Merlin, if you’d have me, I’d like to marry you,” he said softly.

Merlin’s eyes went wide. Wider than they ever had, and his mouth opened in a shocked little circle. In the cell besides them, Gwen gasped. Arthur ignored her in favor of keeping his eyes on Merlin.

“But we can’t,” Merlin said with a frown.

It wasn’t the answer Arthur was hoping for, but he understood the confusion. He sighed and reached in to take Merlin’s hands through the bars. He stroked the back of Merlin’s hands, and wished they were alone. Somewhere private, and not in a damp cell in the dungeons on a chilly night a mere few hours before Merlin’s execution was scheduled.

“That’s not technically a ‘no,’” he pointed out with a little nervous laugh.

“Oh, no!” Merlin exclaimed a little too loudly. “I mean, yes,” he corrected, and then at Arthur’s confused look, “I mean no it’s not a ‘no,’ and yes, it wasn’t technically a ‘no,’ that I’d be more than willing to, I mean not that it’s a case of willing, which I am,” Merlin said quickly, “but that I’d be happy to marry you. I want to marry you. That is, yes. Yes, I will marry you.”

Arthur smiled at his bumbling lover, amused and beaming with happiness. Merlin frowned at him.

“Shut up, you prat,” he mumbled at Arthur’s smug and amused grin.

“That’s no way to talk to you fiancé,” Arthur said, enjoying the taste of the word.

Ignoring him, Merlin asked, “How will this work though? I’m supposed to be-“

“Morgana and I have a plan,” Arthur said quietly.

“What do we do?” Gwen asked.  She was looking positively bursting with happiness at the two of them, and her eyes looked a bit watery.

“Nothing,” Arthur said. “It’s all up to Morgana, really.” He looked down where he was still holding Merlin’s hands. “I’ll be back for you,” he said.

“You aren’t going to tell us what the plan is?” Merlin asked.

“No,” Arthur said. “It’s best if you remain ignorant to it.” Arthur hesitated. “Just know that I do love you, and whether all this were to have happened or not, one day I would have asked you regardless.”

“Er, okay,” Merlin said, looking uncertain at Arthur’s serious tone.

Arthur leaned into the bar and rested his head against the cold iron. Merlin smiled faintly and did the same, liking the way Arthur’s hands kept stroking lovingly across his own. They stayed like that for a few seconds, Gwen forgotten.

“I have to go,” Arthur said finally.

Merlin nodded sadly. Knowing this would be it if whatever plan they had cooked up didn’t work. As if sensing his thoughts, Arthur looked Merlin in the eyes, trying to convey all his love in just his gaze.

“I will come back for you, Merlin. This isn’t goodbye. This will work.”

“I know,” Merlin said, trying to sound confident.

Arthur’s hands squeezed his own and he left. He forced himself not to look back.

***~*~*~***

Arthur found himself pacing once again, this time in a hall two away from his father’s chambers.

Morgana was taking an awful long time, and his mind wouldn’t stop playing out all he horrible possibilities. He kept seeing her rushing in to tell him it had failed, or her not coming at all and Merlin’s execution taking place. Arthur forced to watch.

“Arthur,” Morgana’s voice came, and Arthur’s head snapped up to see her walking towards him with a smile. He closed his eyes in relief.

“I take it you managed to sway Lord Bayard?” he said.

“Did you doubt me?” she asked in mock offense.

“Of course not,” Arthur lied.

“We’ll tell Uther together,” Morgana said, walking up to Arthur and continuing past him. As they walked, she turned to him. “You seem nervous,” she noted.

Arthur laughed emptily.

“He’ll be livid,” he said. “He’ll know what I’ve done. Disobeyed him again. Made a fool of him again. He won’t let me forget this. I’ve crossed him three times now, for Merlin. And now he’ll be forced to accept it, Merlin and I, and that I proved him wrong.”

“That _we_ proved him wrong,” Morgana corrected. “Don’t you try to take all the credit for this Arthur Pendragon,” she smiled as they entered Uther’s hall. “We both did this. It was my plan, after all.”

“Even worse,” Arthur laughed. “Now I’ve turned you against him, too.”

Morgana didn’t say anything as she knocked on Uther’s door.

“Enter,” Uther’s voice called back.

Morgana gave Arthur one last glance, eyebrows raised as if announcing this was it. Arthur felt like he was walking into the den of a dangerous animal, to his doom.

“Ah, Morgana,” Uther said, a smile on his face. He was sitting at his desk, shuffling through papers. With a war coming up, decision had to be made. It was how they’d known he would be awake. He looked relatively calm, not yet tired and irritable as he could get when having to stay up until all hours of the morning making decision only the king could make.

When Arthur walked in behind Morgana, Uther frowned. Suspicion made his eyes narrow.

“Arthur?” he asked, putting down the papers.

“We’ve something to discuss with you,” Morgana stated. “A way to avoid this war between Camelot and Mercia,” she continued.

Uther look intrigued.

“I’ve just spoken to Lord Bayard, actually,” Morgana said, “and he has agreed. It is up to you, my lord, if this war is avoided.”

Uther looked suspicious again.

“What have you done, Morgana?” he asked.

“Lord Bayard agrees if Merlin’s life is spared, that no war shall be waged on Mercia’s part,” she said.

“And why would Lord Bayard care about the life of a lowly servant?” Uther asked, voice going low and his eyes darting to Arthur.

“Well you can’t very well execute your own son’s husband, can you?” Morgana laughed lightly.

“What.” Uther stood. “You told Bayard that Merlin and Arthur were married?”

“No, of course not, “ Morgana said. “I told him they were engaged.”

“That’s a lie!”

“Actually it isn’t,” Arthur piped in. “I asked Merlin ealier,” he said. “I have a witness. The guards would have heard Merlin’s acceptance as well,” Arthur informed him. “He was quite loud,” he added quieter.

“You can’t do this!” Uther said.

“It’s already been done,” Morgana countered. “Lord Bayard said he expects an invitation to the wedding. So, it should probably be held earlier rather than later.”

“You went behind my back, and, and-“

“What did you expect us to do, father?!” Arthur said loudly, cutting Uther off. “You gave me no choice. I won’t let you kill Merlin.” Morgana glanced at him pointedly. “We won’t let you kill Merlin,” Arthur corrected.

“This is absurd,” Uther said.

“What’s done is done,” Morgana said with an air of finality. “Merlin’s execution is set to take place within the hour, so your decision needs to come soon.”

Uther sat down in the chair, defeated. He looked down, thinking it all over, a hand over his mouth, stroking his lip. “You’ve left me no choice,” he said bitterly. “You know what my decision is,” he said.

Arthur held his breath for the words.

“Merlin is free to go,” Uther stated.

Arthur let go of his breath, looking to Morgana in gratitude. With a devilishly smug smile of satisfaction on her face as she looked at Uther, Arthur knew she would hold this over him for years to come.

“Now get out of my sight,” Uther said to the both of them.

Morgana and Arthur did not need to be told twice.

They ran down to the dungeons, blowing past the guards. Morgana was telling Arthur how she would enjoy this debt he now owed her. She was contemplating aloud what she might have him do as a result. One such idea involved Arthur in a dress, his lips pendragon red. He ignored her and ran faster.

A few rays of the rising made it through the windows of the castle, slats of it hitting the walls and floor in a soft red-orange. Arthur’s feet hit the ground hard as he pushed himself to run faster. Word would not have travelled fast enough for the guards to become aware of Uther’s repeal of Merlin’s execution. Arthur begged that Merlin would still be in his cell.

***~*~*~***

Merlin and Gwen were slumped in the same position as they had been when they were sleeping. Gwen was musing about what it would be like for Merlin as Arthur’s husband. Merlin felt himself blushing through most of the conversation. He wasn’t sure if he could quite let himself think so far ahead.

Their cells were starting to become easier to see in, the early morning light slowly managing to make in through the barred windows. Dawn was almost there, and his heart raced a little faster at the thought. Arthur had not yet returned, and Merlin tried not to think about what that meant. Instead, he listened to Gwen talk about flowers and make jokes about if he’d have to wear a dress.

They were both startled when knights came storming into view.

Merlin’s eyes widened as he walked towards the cells. Gwen’s hand squeezed his, scared and unwilling to let go. Merlin realized what this meant. Arthur had failed. Whatever plan he and Morgana had come up with failed, and he was going to be executed.

He was suddenly frozen in fear. He didn’t want to die.

He held on to Gwen’s hand as his heart thudded in his chest. He couldn’t cry or yell, he didn’t know if he could even move. He hoped he could, when the guards grabbed him, he wanted to walk to his death. At least he could die with some dignity.

The knights opened up Gwen’s cell, and before either Merlin or Gwen could process it, grabbed Gwen and yanked her up. Gwen’s hand was pulled from Merlin’s and she yelled, squirming in their grip.

“Get off me!” she yelled, twisting her body away, their grip tightening. “Get off me!” she repeated, louder. “What’s going on?! I’m supposed to me here for another week at the least!” she told them. “Let go!”

“By order of the king, you’ve been sentenced to death,” one of the knights said.

“What?!” Gwen yelled. “No!” She looked to Merlin. “Merlin!” she yelled desperately.

Merlin had jumped to his feet when she had started yelling. His hands were on the bars that separated their cells. “Gwen!” he yelled, and shook them, trying to get to her. He watched, not understanding, feeling scared and horrified as Gwen struggled to get out of their hold. “Gwen!” he yelled again.

The knights started to drag her away. Gwen fought against them as much as she could, but they over powered her easily.

“Merlin!” she yelled.

“Gwen!” Merlin yelled back as the knights started to drag Gwen from her cell. “Gwen!”

Gwen was kicking now, trying as hard as she could to get away.

“This is a mistake!” she yelled. “I’m not supposed to be executed!” she tried. “There’s been a mistake! Lady Morgana will tell you,” she said, looking to each knight on her side.

“Gwen!” Merlin called again.

“I’m not supposed to die! I’m only here for a couple weeks,” she tried to explain to them. Tears were running down her cheeks now. “There’s been a mistake!” She tried to wiggle out of their grasp again, but the knights kept hold of her and dragged her along.

“Gwen!” Merlin yelled louder, running to the bars of his cell door and shaking them violently.

“Please!” Gwen sobbed desperately to the knights. “Please, there’s been a mistake!” She twisted to look back at Merlin. “Merlin! Merlin!” she screamed frantically. The knights were dragging her around the corner as her wide, streaming, terrified eyes found Merlin’s. “Merlin!” she begged.

“Gwen!” Merlin screamed. “Gwen!”

Merlin could hear Gwen pleading with them all the way down the hall. He didn’t stop screaming for her. Eventually, the sound of the door shutting and Gwen’s broken pleas ceased.

Merlin was left alone. He stared at the spot where he had last seen Gwen, her desperate voice ringing in his ears. The sunlight was filling up the cell now, and Merlin’s tears streaked down his face as the realization hit him.

Gwen was taking his place.

He didn’t know why. He knew it would not have been part of Morgana and Arthur’s plan, so why was Gwen being executed? Why was she taking his place on the chopping block? She hadn’t done anything to deserve it. She didn’t even know yesterday was her last, that last night was her last. She hadn’t been able to prepare like Merlin had.

Merlin started to pace, thinking of what could have happened. How would he save Gwen? He had to get word to Arthur somehow. If they came for him next, he’d need to leave a message for Arthur to find. He might be able to save Gwen. Or perhaps there was a spell he could use. Something to get him out of this cell. Or to stop the executioner from swinging that fatal blow.

Merlin was trying to think of any solution, magical or not, when he heard running footsteps and hard breathing coming towards him. Two sets. He looked up quickly to see Arthur and Morgana coming to a stop before him. Arthur was beaming at him, but Merlin didn’t even think about what that meant.

“They took Gwen!” he announced frantically.

“What?” Morgana asked, looking to Gwen’s empty cell. “What happened? Where did they take her?”

Merlin started pacing again as he carded a hand through his hair in frustration. “I don’t know!” he admitted. “We were just sitting here and then these guards came in. Gwen squeezed my hand and we both thought they were here to take me,” Arthur gave him a pained look, “and then they opened up her cell and took her!” Merlin explained. “One of the knights said Uther ordered her execution!” he told them. “But they took her!” he yelled. “She’s supposed to have _time_! She didn’t do anything!” He looked desperately at them. “She’s taking my place, isn’t she?” he asked them, quieter.

“No,” Arthur said shaking his head, completely puzzled.

“That bastard,” Morgana said, staring at Gwen’s cell. She looked between the two of them. “Can’t you see? He’s doing this to get back at us for what we did,” she explained. “He couldn’t kill Merlin, so he’s killing Gwen instead.”

“He can’t!” Merlin yelled as Arthur unlocked his cell door. “We have to do something!” he said, looking at Arthur.

“If they really are replacing you with her, then she’ll be due to be executed within the hour,” Arthur said.

“Less than that,” Morgana corrected. “The only chance we’ve got is to get to her before it happens,” she said, “and think of a solution on the way.”

Merlin nodded and ran out of his cell past them both. “Come on then!” he called, already running through the dungeon halls. He heard Morgana and Arthur start to catch up behind him. As they ran, Morgana told him what they’d done to get him released. Merlin had to admit he was impressed, and that he wished he could have seen Uther’s face when they’d told him.

They made it outside onto the steps in record time, all three of them panting hard. Merlin saw the crowd forming around the platform, whispering amongst themselves loudly. They’d all expected to see Merlin heading for the axe.

“There,” Morgana said, pointing through the crowd.

Merlin followed her finger to see Gwen being brought through the crowd of people. Her hands had been tied in front of her, but at least she was walking now. Merlin couldn’t see her face. He glanced up to see the executioner standing with his axe. Looking up further, Merlin could see Uther standing on the balcony, cruel satisfaction on his face as he watched Gwen go to her death.

“We must hurry,” Arthur said, moving to make his way through the crowd.

“We’ll never make it in time through the crowd,” Merlin said as he took the size of the crowd in.

“We have to try,” Morgana said. “Merlin, you go that way,” she said, head nodding to her left, indicating the passages through the castle, “I’ll go this way,” she said motioning to the right. “Arthur will go through the crowd,” she said, looking to him.

“Right,” Merlin agreed, and ran back inside without another word.

He weaved through the small amount of people in the narrow hall, head turned to look out the windows as he ran. He caught sight of Gwen once more as she was shoved down to a kneeling position. At this angle, he could see her face. Her eyes were closed, but her head was tilted skyward, feeling the sunshine one last time. He could see the drying streaks tears had made down her cheeks, and the puffy redness of her eyes. He noted that she was no longer crying. Gwen was visibly trying to keep herself together, and she would not give anyone the satisfaction of seeing her cry.

He watched as the executioner walked towards her. Uther had started a speech. Something about honor and loyalty. Consequences and betrayal. Merlin didn’t listen. His mind raced as he tried to think of something.

The executioner, a black mask over his face, gripped the axe with both hands and lifted it up. Gwen’s lip trembled as the shadow of the axe’s blade came to a stop just in front of her head. The crowd around them waited patiently as their king finished his speech, eyes glued to either him or Gwen.

As Uther’s speech drew to a close, Merlin spotted an empty alcove with a window. He ran to it, looking down into the crowd. He couldn’t see Morgana or Arthur anywhere. He looked between the king, Gwen, and the axe.

Their options were running out.

Merlin scanned the crowd, noting that all eyes were on Gwen or the king. Alone in the alcove, and with time running out, Merlin realized there was only one thing he could do.

As the axe started to swing down, Merlin didn’t hesitate, raising his hand and his eyes flashing gold.

“Fleoge seax forþ!” Merlin intoned.

While the executioner was finishing the swing, Gwen cringing and tears spilling over in anticipation, the axe suddenly pulled itself from his grip. It levitated upwards above his head in front of everyone, staying there, blade up in the air with the sun glinting across it.

Gwen twisted, looking up as the crowd broke out into an uproar. Merlin watched her eyes widen as she saw the axe far out of reach. Gwen started to look around the crowd, clearly searching for Merlin.

Uther was yelling for his men to find the sorcerer as the knights were already storming the crowd. Gwen was pulled off the platform by Morgana, who was hugging her close. The executioner just standing there, head tilted back as he looked at his levitated axe.

As Morgana led Gwen away, Merlin stepped back from the alcove with a relieved smile.

It didn’t last as he turned to see Arthur staring at him in the hall, just a couple feet away.

Arthur’s mouth was open as if he was going to say something, his eyes wide and his shoulders slumped down. He looked at Merlin like he was a stranger. He seemed too shocked to fully process what he had saw and what he felt.

Merlin had an idea what that would be. Once Arthur was able to move passed his initial shock he would realize. He would realize that Merlin had been lying to him, that he was the very thing Arthur was taught to hate, hunt, and kill. Arthur would never love him then. Not when he realized the betrayal.

Merlin realized he had accidentally just signed his death warrant, and that they conveniently already had an executioner ready to go. Nobody but Arthur had saw, he knew that much. Now that he knew though, Arthur would hate him. He wouldn’t save him a second time. Merlin deserved this death sentence. He broke the law. His very existence broke the law. Arthur would _hate_ him. The only question left was would he swing the axe himself?

Merlin saw the moment Arthur moved passed his shock. The hurt that spread across his face and shined in his eyes was a worse pain than any axe could cause. He staggered back, hand coming up to his head but dropping back down before they could make it.

“Arthur, please,” Merlin started.

Arthur in turn, lifted his gaze to Merlin, his eyes flashing in anger. The next moment he was slamming Merlin into the wall besides the alcove. His hands dug into Merlin’s borrowed tunic as he stood flush against him, face inches away.

Merlin gasped, eyes wide as he wondered if Arthur was going to kill him there in the hall.

Arthur panted in rage, breath blowing onto Merlin in harsh puffs. He was vibrating with anger, looking Merlin directly in the eye. Merlin noted that the few people there had been in the hall were no longer there, and had ran out to see what all the commotion had been about. Little did they know it was all because of him, and they would be missing the real show here. Where their beloved Prince was about to kill his now ex-fiancé in cold blood right in the middle of the hall.

“You idiot,” Arthur seethed, “you absolute idiot.”

Merlin didn’t understand why Arthur had to insult him before he killed him.

“Arthur,” Merlin said, voice breaking. He could feel his eyes prick with tears and the lump forming in his throat, threatening to choke him. It seemed to make Arthur angrier.

“What were you thinking,” Arthur asked him angrily.

Merlin’s lip trembled and he didn’t know how to respond. He wanted to say that he had to. That he was saving Gwen. That he never had, and never would use his magic to harm someone unless it was to protect Arthur or his friends. That he would always protect Arthur. He wanted to tell Arthur that he loved him and that he was sorry. That he never wanted to hurt him. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt him.

But Merlin couldn’t say any of these things.

“You could have died,” Arthur gritted out.

Before Merlin could say anything, Arthur closed the distance between them and kissed him hard.

Merlin felt Arthur’s tongue push into his mouth, claiming him. Merlin’s hands went to Arthur’s arms, to pull him closer or to push him off, he didn’t know. He simply held onto the muscled arms with a tight grip while he tried to figure out which to do. It was hard to think at all with Arthur kissing him like this.

When Arthur broke the kiss, Merlin stared straight ahead as Arthur moved to rest his head on the wall beside Merlin’s head.

“Do you have even an ounce of self-preservation?” Arthur asked. Merlin couldn’t reply. He didn’t know what was happening. “What if someone had _saw_ , you _idiot_ ,” Arthur whispered.

Someone did see. Arthur saw.

Merlin frowned.

“You almost die because you chose to poison yourself to save me. After you _die_ in front of my eyes and come back, you are sentenced to death. Hours before your execution, you agree to marry me and I manage to save your life. And then what do you do?” Arthur asked. “You go and use magic to save someone else and put your life back in danger.”

Merlin honestly did not know how to react right now.

“Do you want to die? Is that it?”

Merlin was so confused.

Arthur pulled back, looking at Merlin’s lost expression. “Answer me,” Arthur frowned.

“You knew?” Merlin asked, not being able to say anything else. It wasn’t exactly what he’d wanted to say, because, well truthfully, he didn’t know what to say. Once the question was out, however, he needed an answer.

Arthur looked at him in that way he did when he wondered if Merlin really did have some grave mental affliction.

“Of course I knew,” he said.

Merlin almost sobbed at it. In fact, he did. The sound coming to his ears, and his head thudding against the wall as he heaved in a breath. Arthur shifted against him, his hands letting go of his tunic and sliding down to hold him at his waist.

“It’s not like you’re subtle about it,” Arthur said, as if Merlin should have _known_.

“When did you,” Merlin swallowed and tried again, “when did you find out?”

“Remember our little fight?” Arthur asked. “The one before you saved my life and became my manservant?” he prompted. Merlin nodded. He’d called Arthur a royal arse. It didn’t go over well. “You used magic against me at the end,” Arthur stated calmly. As if that was a causal thing he could say aloud in Camelot and not get someone killed for it.

“You saw that?”

“Merlin, I was right in front of you when your eyes glowed gold and things moved on their own,” Arthur said in that special are-you-this-thick tone he had just for Merlin.

Merlin couldn’t help but laugh.

“This isn’t funny,” Arthur said. “If it had been anybody else your head would be on that chopping block,” he said, and he was right.

Merlin couldn’t bring himself to care though. Arthur was alive. Gwen was safe, and knew about his magic. Mercia wasn’t going to rage war on Camelot. Lord Bayard was expecting to see their wedding. Arthur wasn’t going to kill him. Arthur _knew about his magic and didn’t hate him._

Merlin surged forward and kissed Arthur, wrapping his arms around his neck as he felt Arthur’s arms tighten around his waist.

“You really _are_ an idiot,” Arthur said after the kiss ended, his lips still close enough to brush against Merlin’s when he spoke.

Merlin grinned at him.

Arthur shook his head, a smile pulling at his lips as if he couldn’t stop it. He kissed Merlin again before resting his forehead on his.

“I love you,” he said softly.

“I love you, too,” Merlin whispered back.

 


End file.
